Once Again I Am At Deaths Door (ao3 Is Down)

I’m sorry, but remember when I was in my tags talking abt Bellweather and their amazing fics? I said something along the lines of “plz update your circus fic I need more universal swing Kyle” (I’m talking abt their fic “If Bodies Could Fly” go read it it’s really good). Well, guess what happened yesterday, ie the first day with ao3 back from war? IT WAS UPDATED!!!!! That was probs my favorite thing to ever happen to me. So whoever sees/cares abt this pls go read their fic. It’s really worth it :)

FUCKING GOD DAMMIT!!!!

hi asking about ur Gross wip in the hopes that the song fic title is from the song i know that is titled “Gross” also 👀

if you are thinking penelope scott’s gross then you are thinking correct lol. kind of hoping you are - that song is one of my personal favorites hehe. kinda sad if it is - the original idea got warped into something WAY more fluffy than gross is, but never fear bc that song will return with its intended angst wether i have to force myself to write it or not.

anyways, you probably won’t have toooo much interest in it, seeing as it isn’t for sp. it’s a one piece (live action bc i love them) fanfic, because i am a liar and a fandom hopping fraud. I was scrolling through my yt shorts one day and stumbled upon that one “you dated brutal dictator of Nicaragua?!” meme and my brain went: “oh. i can do something with this. Small snippet under the cut ;P

REMINDER THAT THIS IS A WIP AND A ROUGH DRAFT AND THAT I KINDA SUCK AT WRITING OK OK GOOD NOW PROCEED WITH CAUTION

Sanji is washing the dishes, the rest of the crew sitting at the dining table conversing. He flits in and out of the conversation, adding bits here and there as he continues his task. The day is peaceful, and Sanji feels at rest.

Nami sits, legs crossed over the top of the chair next to her - Zoro’s - with the newspaper propped into her lap. Zoro sits in his chair, slouching against it and looking mildly annoyed at Nami’s legs at the back of his chair but not saying a word about it. Across the table is Usopp, tinkering on seas knows what, and Luffy, content in gnawing through a bundle of fish jerky Sanji made earlier that morning.

The breeze is light, floating through the open windows and door. The sunshine shines brightly through into the galley, and with the crew this docile together it’s, well… peaceful, like he’s said before.

Of course, that’s when they decide to throw the conversat into a depth Sanji is thoroughly avoiding, and has been since six months after… that.

“Usopp, how long were you and Kaya together?” Luffy asks, interrupting Usopp’s story - one about Kaya, and those were the closest you can get to the truth from him.

Usopp pauses at the words, face going slightly red as he sputters out a reply.

“W-Well, Luffy, the great captain Usopp speaks not of the mountains of women he’s conquered! It is not befitting to-“

“They weren’t together,” Nami says, looking at Usopp with an unsurprised look. “He’s too chicken for that.” With that, she turns her attention back to her newspaper, flipping the page and reading it off.

“Hey-!”

“Did you ever have someone like Usopp didn’t have Kaya?” Luffy asks, because the kid can’t read a room. Usopp lets out an offended noise, and Nami doesn’t even look up from the paper as she speaks next.

“Nope, no time for that.”

Luffy hums, looking over the table. He goes to speak, most likely to ask the question to Zoro, but the green-headed swordsman interrupts him.

“No, Luffy. That’s not my style. Why not ask cook?” Zoro’s tone turns from unamused to smug, and he smirks. He turns in his seat to face Sanji, who has gone back to vigorously scrubbing the plate in his hand as he hopes to be kept out of the conversation. “He’s seen the most people, he must have great stories.”

Sanji turns, sneering at Zoro, before he grabs the next plate and gets to scrubbing.

“Sanji! Tell me a story!” Luffy shouts from his spot, getting excited. Nami turns her attention from her newspaper, looking mildly intrigued. Sanji sighs.

“No. I gave you food, occupy yourself.” Sanji shouts over his shoulder, and Luffy pouts.

“C’mon, Sanji. You must have a good story for us.” Nami says, trying to bait him into it. Everyone turned to face him, Usopp and Luffy putting on their best puppy dog eyes in hopes for some entertainment. Sanji pauses his fish washing, considering before shaking his head and turning around.

“I’m sorry, Nami dearest, but there truly is nothing for me to discuss on this topic. There has been nobody of notice in that area of my life, and besides, a gentleman does not kiss and tell.” He says, using a tone of remorse. Nami quirks an eyebrow at him, face going from casual to interested.

“Was that a lie, Sanji-san?” Nami asks, face breaking out into an amused smirk.

Of fucking course the brilliant redhead would see through his lie. He sighs, admitting defeat.

“You truly are too clever for your own good, my swan.” He says, moving to the table and sitting in an empty seat. The other three males look at him with varying degrees of surprise - it is very out of character for Sanji to lie to the crew let alone Nami, a woman.

“Sanji, share!” Luffy whines, wanting to hear what could possibly be such a grandiose secret to Sanji that he’d hide it.

“Be quiet, Luffy, I’m thinking of where to start.”

“How about the beginning, curly.” Zoro says, and Sanji so wants to ring the other man’s throat for being so smug. Instead, he takes a deep breath.

“Alright,” Sanji exhales, grabbing at the pack of cigs in his pocket and the lighter sitting near them. He knows he’ll need a cigarette to get through this. “So this story starts about five years ago…”

spotify yes spotify 🫡

Thoughts??

You should aim to listen more next year, really get your money's worth

This is the message I think everyone needs to hear today

ITS FUCKING BACK!!!! HELL YEAH!!!! NO MORE FANZINES FOR ME!!!!!

reminder to all of my whores viewing the eclipse today:

-wear eclipse glasses. i don’t care how strong you think your eyes are, you’re gonna hurt yourself

-Aztecs thought Quetzalcoatl, a giant ass serpent, are the sun so if you don’t like snakes you better watch out cuz your next

-Mexican legend says that any pregnant woman that sees the eclipse will inadvertently cause her child’s face to get eaten by a jaguar later in life so, yknow, maybe close your eyes if superstition is your thing.

-please make sure you are aware of your surroundings. staring at the sky with dark glasses leaves you kinda vulnerable, so be by people you trust in a safe environment.

-eclipses can be seen as culturally bad, but really they are transformative. do something new, go see a friend, go on a date, buy a cake or something.

-go leave a flower on your loved ones grave or something. some Native American tradition calls this a time of mourning, so pay attention little live for those who can’t be with you to see the eclipse.

-no, this is not the end of the world. it’s just really cool.

-if your really worried that you like contracted a space disease then go and take a bath after. and if you’re not, take one just to relax. bathes are fun.

-you don’t need to have money to enjoy it. if you don’t have glasses then use something from here: https://www.statesman.com/story/news/state/2024/04/08/watch-solar-eclipse-safely-without-glasses-alternative-tree-leaves-colander-pinhole-projector-box/73242785007/#. i’ve used a colander to watch a partial eclipse and it was still awesome.

drink some water, grab your glasses, head to your lawn and enjoy the view. if you’re not in the path of totality or just won’t be seeing it at all, then enjoy the experience of knowing that’s somewhere on this planet something monumental is happening and you are alive for it.

Hehehehehehe

soooo I made another song fic bc apparently that’s my thing now.

so basically luffy and the gang get locked in prison. sanjis the only one not there, but when they try to get ahold of her she’s not answering.

….neither is Ace. Weird.

(it’s bc they’re trying to fuck also everyone’s genderbent cuz i ❤️ lesbians and they are my most favorite women. also zoro’s boobs save the day. plz read it)

Hehehehehehehehehehh

I just found out that these dumb fucking freaks are trying to take not only my soft gay shit, but my fucking porn too. I’m sorry, but wHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING?!?! If I loose this, I have nothing to live for. That means that I am all the more willing to fucking SLAUGHTER whoever dare try and lay a fucking FINGER on my HARDCORE GAY SMUT!!!! You know, I always said that I wouldn’t write any hardcore smut until the stars aligned and I knew that nobody I knew would find my Tumblr or ao3 account, but idk anymore. I’ll be setting up a pole soon for what you guys wanna see. Fandom, type of shit, all that jazz. Wait for that update and give me some feedback on whatever deranged shit you want me to post for my first on ao3 in honor of the

HAPPY BARBENHEIMER DAY LOSERS!!! I’m currently out of town, so I will not be checking this site until after I see these two movies (I’m gonna be theatre hopping someday soon so don’t worry I’ll be able to rave about it soon ;) ) SO EVERYONE GO SEE BARBIE AND OPPENHEIMER IN THEATERS OKAY SEE YALL ON THE FLIP!!!!!