*covered In Blood* I'm Literally Fine Guys. Im Still Funny. Would You Like To Hear A Joke Im Going To

I don't wanna know your star sign reblog and tell me how many pillows you sleep with and what your favorite kind of cereal is

I introduced my coworkers to the term "wet cat" and it's my favorite thing ever, anytime one of them just looks kinda sad they start yelling at them to stop being so wet cat

It blows my mind that people don't know about captain underpants

hey guys so apparently the boss baby was based off a book

literally fuck companies that don't want their employees to act "unprofessional" in front of customers. I'm at a five guys rn and the employees here are joking around calling orders back and forth to each other and saying things in weird voices and laughing with each other while they work. Someone just came in for their shift while I was waiting for my food and was greeted by the whole kitchen with a secret handshake lookin thing. It was so silly and cute I love seeing ppl have fun at work and I know my food's gonna be bomb bc the ppl there are having fun with each other. Let employees be people and friends and have fun what is the issue!!!!

youre never alone. bacteria

fuck all that. in 2025 we are doing nothing

tumblr users love reading. you literally stopped for this post just because it has words in it

Aging is hot. Gray hairs are hot. Smile lines are hot. Get with it.