Let’s Be Wonderfully Oversized Sylvanian Families With Mama

I work with kids (around ages 2 to 5 normally) and here’s a list of Crazy Things Kids Say/Do from this week:

•

3-yr-old boy, pointing to a paper towel in my hand: “I want to eat that!”

Me, looking at him with confusion because I know this boy knows what a paper towel is: “…this is a paper towel.”

Boy, with a sigh so big and heavy it would rival that of a grown man who just got told the bar was out of his favorite beer after an exhausting work week: “oookaayyyy…😔😔😔”

•

5-year-old girl who has never talked like this a day in her life, running to her mother with all the fervor of a Victorian child who just discovered a ghost in her old rickety house: “Mama! Mama, come quick! Something strange has happened!”

(The strange thing was that the lights had been turned off in the part of the building that we weren’t currently using and it was Slightly Darker than Usual.)

•

Little girl, finding me on the playground and running up to me with wide eyes, practically whispering: “Do you want some mulch candy?”

Me, playing along: “ooo, mulch candy??”

The girl silently puts a singular piece of mulch into my hand and runs away looking suspicious, leaving me to wonder if I just participated in some kind of illegal mulch deal.

•

There was a little boy who kept wanting to wash his hands for no reason which was fine and I would’ve let him do if he didn’t keep trying to walk into the bathroom while there was another kid in there. So after a few times of this he was a little annoyed and to get back at me he rolled this big toy truck over to the sink, somehow managed to lift it over his head and get it onto the counter, then rolled it into the sink, and just stood there looking at the Truck In The Sink with the most smug look I have ever seen.

Me upon realizing they are literally me and my SO🙃

Donald “my wife is a bitch and I like her so much” Duck🩷🖤

Babbies!!

sleepy dragons

There’s a SHINGLE in my tree

If Weyler isn't endgame, WHAT ARE THESE SCENES FOR????

Photo credit to @1liv for that first pic.

merman spa day 🫧

while reading a good ol waterproof book, as one does

This art calms me

rooftop party🌇🎉

Willow calling Hunter “pretty boy” :3

Bite bite

she

I need this now pLEASe

Do you see the vision?

I'm just gonna leave this here because Wednesday ain't the only one seeing the visions...

Mermay 2025 by Paul Briggs