I Have A Good Dog

Listen guys, this important. I need gifs of Taemins tiny hands being tiny. I need SeRaToNiN STAT.

A truly impressed fan, circa 2015 (I think)

Normal is their second name.

Update

Since making this post five minutes ago, I e run my program five times thinking “this is the one”

Aibiehfowhskvjevslv

That isn’t a key smash, it’s what I’ve now named it. My forehead did the transcription tho…

Edit: i started the program right after this with a post ready saying “finally got it!” Only after realizing I forgot to implement the fix. Don’t drink and computer, kids.

New drinking game: every time you have to close and then start back up a program while fixing it, take a sipp.

Can confirm get drunk wuick.

A different summary: there is no longer a grandstand there.

For the last decade or so, I’ve been routinely attending a ride-on lawnmower race. I’ve always wanted to participate, but the high cost of used mowers is better spent on more practical vehicles, like literally anything else. Sometimes, though, the universe sends you a message. And in my case, that message came in the form of an awkward leg of a huge trade-in scam.

Picture, if you will, the humble redneck. They await the approach of big, fast domestic mowers. John Deeres, Cub Cadets, even weird modified Chinese stuff they looted from Aliexpress. There is jubilance, but that soon comes to an awkward hush. An unfamiliar engine note approaches.

My International 1480 combine harvester, all ten tons of it, is barrelling down the highway at a clip somewhere between “tepid” and “jaunty.” Even though I have shown up for a race, I am sandbagging a little bit, making sure that the bets get settled against my vehicle before I show them the might of a fully operational monster such as mine.

Technically, there is no violation. I had looked at the rulebook from every angle in the previous year: it has the correct number of wheels, the proper agricultural intent, and with precise work on the tiller, it can even (poorly) mow a suburban lawn. Is it modified? Oh yes, yes indeed, but I see the nitrous bottles poking out from the rows of Kubotas at the starting line.

And when I leave the starting line, it is a thing of beauty. At least for a few milliseconds. It seems that the wizards at International Harvester simply did not comprehend of a situation in which the frame of their combine would be launched into the air by means of one thousand eight hundred foot-pounds of supercharger-bolstered torque. I had erroneously believed that the loose soil of the rural community would let the wheels dip in, but now I am facing directly into the sky, having twelve o’ clocked hard on my wheelie, shooting flames from my exhaust and whirling vertical blades of death towards the grandstand.

It’s not about whether you win or lose. Sometimes it’s about how many pages you add to the rulebook.

I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t do this, but things are getting crazy. Among Us keeps getting hacked, and I’m pretty sad because it is a legitimately fun game. Most trendy games are time wasters, but this is something I’d play for years.

With that said, I’m calling out to ANONYMOUS. I believe in you guys, and I believe you care when people use hacking against other internet denizens. So, please, help Sloth solve this problem. Let’s unite and show these hacks that they can’t just willfully attack people.

That is all.

“You need to believe in things that aren’t true. How else can they become” - Hogfather, Terry Pratchett

I have family of choice in Barcelona, and it pleases me to learn not just of their struggles, but of their triumphs. Quiero a todo voz.

Heck yeah weasels.

the one thing thing funnier than this caption is that the only reason they stopped doing it was that the ferret shit in the tube

Happy Pride Month dudes!!!!!!