Prophecies For The Signs

type of humor

aries: deadpan

taurus: knock knock jokes

gemini: self-deprecating

cancer: juvenile 

leo: hyberbolic

virgo: morbid

libra: highbrow

scorpio: sarcasm 

sagittarius: puns

capricorn: memes

aquarius: stand-up

pisces: situational irony

the signs and their dreams

Vivid, intense: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius,

Meaningful, complex: Taurus, Gemini, Libra

Precognitive, psychic: Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces

Ambiguous, symbolic: Virgo, Capricorn, Aquarius

The Sign’s Handwriting (Mercury)

**Mercury rules communication, speech, and writing, so it also determines handwriting. You can also check your sun sign for this.

Aries: big letters, gets sloppier as they get farther along—although it may not have been neat to begin with. bares down hard, breaks pencil tips easily. 

Taurus: rigid. classic. doesn’t venture far from the standard letter writing techniques. probably really good at cursive and calligraphy. 

Gemini: constantly changing the way they write letters, switches back and forth between print and cursive. probably good at imitating other people’s handwriting. pointy letters.

Cancer: pretty handwriting. simple. easy to read. letters are spaced kind of far apart. most likely to dot their i’s with circles or hearts.

Leo: big, fanciful letters. has a unique, creative way of writing. they probably do some odd little thing that most people find strange. most obnoxious signature ever. 

Virgo: small, neat, precise letters spaced kind of close together. writes in perfectly straight lines. letters don’t slant. judges people for their sloppy handwriting. 

Libra: teenage girl handwriting where every letter is the same size and height. really neat and aesthetically pleasing to look at. 

Scorpio: possibly sloppy handwriting. curly letters that aren’t always the same size. doesn’t stay inside the lines.

Sagittarius: writes quickly but neatly. doesn’t bare down very hard. writes just above the line and spreads their words out. probably developed really good shorthand for taking notes.

Capricorn: carefully and methodically writes every word. perfect print handwriting. perfect cursive. simple and clean. straight lines. no slants or curves. maybe a little bit boring, as far as handwriting goes.

Aquarius: 75 percent neat. 25 percent sloppy. gets worse as they lose motivation. words may be spread out. Starts writing certain letters differently because they feel like it. has pretty handwriting but always says they don’t.

Pisces: words slant either to the right or left. words are kind of spaced out. doesn’t bare down very hard. handwriting has a dreamy sort of quality. rounded letters. the type to write in half cursive, half print. 

Colorful Astrology: Shades of GREEN

Aries: Lime

Taurus: Emerald

Gemini: Pear

Cancer: Pistachio

Leo: Chartreuse

Virgo: Crocodile

Libra: Olive

Scorpio: Pine

Sagittarius: Parakeet

Capricorn: Sage

Aquarius: Seafoam

Pisces: Mint

/// Color Palette: http://tinyurl.com/qdlbhfq

Samelia Pondchester

YES GOOD

Who cooks: Sam prefers to but they alternate

Who does the laundry and other chores: Both

How many children do they have: Two

Who’s more dominate: Sam

Favorite nonsexual activity: Picnics

Their favourite place to be together: Home

Any traditions: Every Christmas they go all out, Sam decorating the house to the extreme with Amy complaining about having to take it down later, but secretly loving every moment of it. Then they have proper big family dinners, inviting Dean, Castiel and the Doctor along.

Their “song”: Copacabana by Barry Manilow, the song that was playing when Sam proposed.

What they do for each other on holidays: Say they won’t give each other presents but then both of them still get each other presents.

Where did they go for their honeymoon: France

Where did they first meet: Amy was in America for a break and got caught up in one of Sam and Dean’s hunts. Then she asked him out and a year later in the middle of a hunt decided to get married and had Castiel do the wedding authorising thingy.

Any pets: A dog, though Amy was reluctant at first

What do they fight over: Sam’s hair.

Do they go on vacations, if so where: Anywhere really. They’ll get the Doctor to pick them up, specifying somewhere safe even though they know it rarely ends up being that way.

as Uncommon Majors

Aries: Youth Development

Taurus: Dietics

Gemini: Botany

Cancer: Zoology

Leo: Meteorology

Virgo: Anthropology

Libra: Ancient Civilization

Scorpio: Communication Sciences & Disorders

Sagittarius: Foreign Languages & Cultures

Capricorn: Philosophy

Aquarius: Broadcasting

Pisces: Creative Writing

The signs as weird things I've seen on google

Aries: I think I just had a poop child. I legit think I lost 4 kilos.

Taurus: Are there people who are sexually attracted to Pokémon?

Gemini: I hate it when I'm studying and a velociraptor throws bananas at me.

Cancer: I just went outside and heard someone boo. Update: it was my wife.

Leo: NEVER PUT A SOCK IN A TOASTER.

Virgo: Can Jesus microwave a burrito?

Libra: What are these strawberries doing on my nipples I need them for my fruit salad.

Scorpio: I like to tape my thumbs together and pretend I'm a dinosaur- what did you expect? Some freaky bondage? Nah my mum doesn't approve of that soz.

Capricorn: What do I do if a ginger kid bites me?

Sagittarius: What would a chair look like if your knees were bend the other way?

Aquarius: Why can't I own a dwarf Chinese person?

Pisces: Sometimes when I'm alone I pretend I'm a carrot.

Weird Holidays the Signs should celebrate

Aries: Common Courtesy Day (Mar 21)

Taurus: Pizza Party Day (May 19)

Gemini: Repeat Day (June 3)

Cancer: Take your Dog to Work Day (June 23)

Leo: Lazy Day (Aug 10)

Virgo: Be Late for Something Day (Sep 5)

Libra: Wear Something Gaudy Day (Oct 17)

Scorpio: National Absurdity Day (Nov 20)

Sagittarius: Pretend to be a Time Traveler Day (Dec 8)

Capricorn: Make up your Mind Day (Dec 31)

Aquarius Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk Day (11 Feb, United States)

Pisces: Public Sleeping Day (Mar 16)

The Signs: Dark Rulerships

Dark and unusual things over which each sign rules.

Aries: accidents, barren places and burned ground, cuts, doorways, insomnia, nosebleeds, skulls, surgery, thistles, trances, wolves

Taurus: coins, dogma, strangulation, gluttony, psychometry, suspect and unsafe places

Gemini: breath, pupils, rumors, chests, crystals, hounds, ribs, forgetting, pillars

Cancer: blood serum, graves, onyx, cellars, cradles, marshes, night flowers, glass, wells

Leo: fortresses and lairs, arrogance, chamomilla, ballrooms, circuses and playgrounds, vomiting

Virgo: black cats, fractured bones, libraries, intestines, conceit and inferiority, sick rooms, parasites

Libra: vines and lilies, marble, trials, alcoves and closets, vertebrae, forests, manipulation, attics

Scorpio: cesspools, bile, funerals and embalmers, magic, foul odors and stagnant water, blood red, vermin and mobs

Sagittarius: the spine, altars, visions and prophecy, incense, holy books, arteries

Capricorn: decay, abandoned places, thorns and nightshade, bones, coffins and mortuaries, gates, acid and ashes

Aquarius: ether and blood, radio static, teeth, rebellions, black pearls, nuclear weapons

Pisces: abbeys, enemies, hospitals and anesthetics, veils, outcasts and charlatans, clairvoyance, gasoline, mazes, falsity, self-undoing

The Signs as the 12 Olympians

Aries: Hephaestus

Taurus: Demeter

Gemini: Hermes

Cancer: Hera

Leo: Zeus

Virgo: Athena

Libra: Aphrodite

Scorpio: Ares

Sagittarius: Apollo

Capricorn: Artemis

Aquarius: Dionysus

Pisces: Poseidon