I"m Thinking About Beetee One Day Post Mockingjay Talking To Katniss & Her Saying She Used To Weekly

Haymitch and his ducklings

I love how Artemis flings him around in Outlaws

Peter "She came with me" Mellark

Peter "We actually got married" Mellark

Peter "If it weren't for the baby" Mellark

The Iliad is insane. Like batshit crazy. I'm only on book 4 so far. Its chaotic af

- More 💖drama💖 than any soap opera.

- Achilles asking his mom to kill everyone just cos they upset him

- Achilles Daddy Issues!

- Achilles & Patroclus seem cute in theory, but ACHILLES DOESN'T DESERVE PATROCLUS.

- Thetis is a mafia mommy, literally every God owes her.

- hera just like if I kill ur fav city, u can kill mine

- Helen literally calls herself a slut

- Hector calls his brother paris: "sex crazed seducer", & "should never have been born" & "disgrace"

- We love Hector.

- ACHILLES IS A DISNEY PRINCESS!!!!!

- Ares just vibin in all the death.

- we live to be as petty as Eris

- almost all female characters are girlboss, gatekeep, gaslight.

- all homeric heroes literal psychopaths.💀

- agamemnon's brother gets shot, he literally makes a speech about how that affects him - Menelaus literally comforts him while bleeding

- athene grabs Achilles' hair and stops him from lunging to kill someone, while invisible. That most look so silly.

- We also love Nestor 😍

GET. AI. OUT. OF. FANDOM. Stop making headcanons with it, stop making fanfic with it, stop making fanart with it. If I see one more "asking chatgpt *blank* about *character/characters in a fandom* I'm going to lose my goddamn mind. Use your own fucking brain, stop asking AI to do everything. You could even ask other real people what they think. Just. Stop. Using. AI. In. Creative. Spaces.

I know a lot of ppl talk about Ford’s fucked up sleeping schedule but we are missing out on both of the sea Grunkles having absurd sleeping schedules.

You’re telling me, Stanley Danley Pines, a man who had a day job of performing, watching over the kids, and having the night job of having to figure out complex equations, having to take up mechanics to re build the portal and a tracking device to find where Ford is theoretically in the multiverse would be have the best sleeping schedule?!

Mans probably taking random ass naps during the daytime. Neither of the brother have proper sleep schedules.

Oh you've given me a reason to talk about the Stan twins and sleeping, you're going to regret this

Between the two of them, I am of the controversial opinion that its STAN who doesn't sleep.

Ford knows the value of sleep. He spent however long avoiding sleep as a LIFE OR DEATH type situation (Bill) and THEN spent 30 years in the multiverse in constant danger sleeping only when he could. Ford has had a terrible relationship with sleeping for forever, even when he was a teen, desperate to prove himself, he wasn't sleeping in order to study and read.

Which is WHY, retired Ford? Fucking LOVES to sleep.

Bill is gone. He's on a boat, safe, with his brother by his side and all the food, medical supplies, and resources he could ever need or want, studying anomalies on what is basically a never ending vacation. All this to say, FORD takes naps. He takes naps in bed, at all hours. He takes naps on couches, on chairs, on the desk, sitting upright in kitchen stools, Ford takes naps in the car, no matter what car, whatever. If the place is VAUGLY comfortable and his brother is nearby, Ford is out like a light. The man makes napping an OLYMPIC LEVEL SPORT and he wins it like everything else. The amount of sleep he gets is something to aspire to.

STAN on the other hand. Is the opposite. His sleep was not a constant pull towards factors he could not control, his sleep schedule is as solid as stone and as unending as steel.

It's just TERRIBLE.

Stan runs, fully functional and his ultimate cheery (grumpy) self, on MAXIMUM three hours of sleep a night. 10 years of rigorous sleep schedule to move the car he's sleeping in so he doesn't get his window knocked on by police. Top THAT with 30 years of running the shop during the day, and spending ALL NIGHTS EVERY NIGHT working on the portal, means that Stan's body has given up the fight of demanding more sleep and just thrown in the towel, and Stan gets by with basically nothing

This is, predictably, SUPER GODDAMN UNHEALTHY.

When Ford gets back, Stan sort of. Doesn't know what to do with himself. He's awake, no matter of tossing and turning really matters, he's just. Perfectly fine being alive at 2 in the morning

After the memory gun, Ford is VERY CONCERNED by this behavior, CONVINCED that the not sleeping thing is a side effect. It isn't until Stan gets all his memories back (and after Stan yells at him for hovering) that Ford internalizes that Stan really. Just. Doesn't sleep.

(He learns the reasons for it and has a whole ADDITIONAL guilt spiral on top of the Bill cipher/memory gun one. Stan has to actually wrestle him into the idea that he loves him anyway)

Que Stanford Pines Ultimate Plan to get Stan to sleep more.

Hes a doctor twelve times over, surely this will be easy.

ERR WRONG. Stan is a hard nut to Crack.

Super comfortable bed? No change. Better pillows? Ultra soft blankets? Nope. Weighted blankets? Stan feels too constricted, opposite effect. Darkened bedroom space? Too dark. Nightlight? The blue light makes them BOTH have night terrors. Sleep aids like sleeping pills or dummies? Stan compares them to the drugs the mental institution gave him and Ford hucks them into the ocean.

Stan's BATSHIT sleep schedule is a constant battle Ford has to fight, but by god is he going to win. Eventually.

he’d forgotten how much he missed that smile.

The cat stan au is the funniest "Ford and Stan fix their relationship on their late twenties/early thirties" au. Soley bc the author decided that they wouldn't go for Fiddauthor and also didnt not go for Fiddauthor. They made those men coparent a bug together. This is so much funnier than having them just kiss. One of them hates said bug for like a solid month while coparenting him. They aren't even tempted to hook up or date each other but they are parents with one of those men's wife, their roommate who's the others brothers ex, and a magical brother cat They collectively parent Shifty as a unit of five.

For a large chunk of time Fidds was convinced Shifty would eat them in their sleep one night! Imagine coparenting with your college roomate (whos married heterosexually) and he thinks your baby is evil and wants you for lunch! Imagine leaving your family for science with your bestie and said bestie accidentally makes you adopt a kid that you hate bc its a sin against god..

Tate and Shifty became twins with extra steps. Shifty is brothers with Tate and Tate now has new uncles that are sort of parents to his brother. The boys are bros but only really have two parents in common. Which almost sounds normal until you remember that one of them has five parents.

Carla is there sort of parenting Shifty at times but is mostly just a babysitter/roommate and Stan is feeding the bug dead birds. Stan watched his brother treat the alien bug child like a creature in absolute HORROR for at least a few weeks. Stan orchestrated a baby heist (mind you as a cat) bc Ford and Fidds were being bad parents.

This is so much funnier than just making Ford and Fidds have an affair they are instead doing something much more baffling. At least them cheating is simple this is instead a QPR with alot of convoluted steps. They didn't even know they were coparenting till like a month in either.

Oh cat stan au the fanfiction that you are.

This is so dramatic of me but I hate hate hate the swear jar headcanon for Jason. Like holy shit sit down for two seconds and think of the implications of taking away money from a child that lived below the line of poverty for all their life and was homeless for three years if they do something you don't like. Are you insane

Agamemnon *grumpy & glaring*: this is stupid

Menelaus *twirling*: I think it's neat.

Yeah it’s MAY already so… would you want…