We all know that Neil has two smiles, his "Neil-smile" and his "Nathaniel-smile". I went through the books to see how many times Neil actually smiles, because god knows it's not that many.
His "Nathaniel-smile" pops up a few times, usually when he's around Riko, threatening someone, or daydreaming about his father's gruesome death.
"Are you threatening a federal agent?" Nathaniel smiled so hard his burns ached. "I wouldn't dare."
He smiles his normal or "Neil-smile" a total of eight times through the series. Never in the first book, twice in the second, and six times in the third. Out of these eight, four were towards Andrew, one to Kevin, one to Wymack, one to Nicky, and one to Matt.
Nicky subsided with a lightning-quick grin in Neil's direction. Neil managed a small smile back.
The original point of this post was that Neil really doesn't smile or laugh or anything as much as he does in fanfictions and stuff. Andrew and Neil are not a grumpyxsunshine trope, Neil is not the light to Andrew's darkness, they're both massively fucked up and Neil does his crazy serial killer smile more often than his regular one.
He couldn't sleep, but at least he could daydream his father's death over and over again. That was almost enough to make him smile, and eventually it thawed the chill from his veins.
Anyways, that šøš¢š“ the original point of the post, but now I'm stuck thinking about how cute it is that he literally smiles only eight times throughout the entire series, and š§š°š¶š³ of them are to Andrew. It's so fucking cute, especially when you consider the circumstances of the rest of them.
Andrew, who for once hadn't wasted their time denying that this thing between them might actually mean something to both of them. Neil hadn't even noticed the silence at first, too distracted by his dizzying thoughts. Now he couldn't help but smile and pull Andrew in.
He shares a tired smile with Kevin after the first Raven match. He smiles when Wymack picks up the phone when he calls him after he comes back from Evermore. He returns Nicky's grin with a small smile to reassure himself when Riko comes to watch their match against the Longhorns. And he gives Matt a tight smile during the final match against the Ravens.
"Neil?" All the gruff posturing left Wymack's voice; that sharp edge was all alarm. "Are you all right?" Neil smiled. It felt like it tore his face open. "No. No, I'm not. I know it's kind of sudden, but can you come get me? I'm at the airport."
With Andrew, basically every single time is directly š£š¦š¤š¢š¶š“š¦ of him. Those smiles are some of the only times he actually feels or shows genuine pleasure or happiness, and I just think that's so cute.
It wasn't funnyānone of this wasābut that response was so obnoxious and so typically Andrew that Neil couldn't help but smile.
Technically he does smile a ninth time, at all of the Foxes, but since that was immediately after and because of Riko's death, I'm tempted to classify it as a "Nathaniel-smile" lmao.
Neil looked from one tired face to the next, soaking them in, reveling in everything they'd accomplished tonight and imagining how they'd react when they heard the news tomorrow. "What's so funny?" Nicky asked when he spotted Neil in the doorway. Neil hadn't realized he was smiling. "Life?"
(Also the word smile no longer feels like a word to me now. I never realised how often Renee smiled until I had to go through every single time any character smiled in the books)
yes yes yes exactly!! literally makes me giggle to think about. like imagine you play an exy game, drink copious amounts of vodka afterwards, and then your roommates do. not. let. you. sleep. all so that they can drag you and most the team to an annoying ass interview (your first in nine months) and you wake up after the bus ride there to your dad kicking you and telling you he doesnāt care about your complaints
he mustāve been a bit hungover and so tired and hereās wymack, sending him on laps up and down the bus so he canāt fall back asleep. i love them, wymack wouldāve been like this all the time if he was raising kevin
every time i reread aftg (the original trilogy) i forget how sassy wymack is and its literally amazing
here are some examples from tfc:
first line and heās opening with sass at a 10/10
i. love. him.
great one liner but the whole thing is hilarious
the way he just speaks over seth is everything lmaooooo
āwatch me beam with prideā im. dyinggggg
kicking kevin? š the colon??? iconic
the forming relationship between him and neil actually means the world to me
oh absolutely. and i think the first time he saw jean at the airport he was subtly searching jeanās face for remnants of that day, for that hollow look in his eyes that noah had
Fun question: do y'all think Jeremy blames himself for Jean's crash out in TSC bc he's the one that accidentally broke the news about Riko? And do you think he draws "what if" kind of parallels between Jean & Noah?
having autism is so annoying sometimes because tell me why i have not been able to enjoy listening to music all weekend
my brain wants the familiarity of songs i know backwards and forwards but nothing in my liked songs will satisfy the itch because theyāre not new but i cannot listen to a new song because i donāt yet know it but i can never know it without listening to it ughhhhhh
on my knees praying, begging, that kevin is an observant narrator. please kevin youāre so judgmental, give us so many details š i need to have more than scraps in the sequel, i need your thoughts and comments on everything
I keep thinking my sunsent-time lighting is getting repetitive, but then i do pieces like these that end up feling kinda soft and i can't think of a better type of ligthing to give it that matches the vibe š
oh butch transmasc andrew minyard⦠oh save me. oh he has glasses and piercings (especially an anti-eyebrow) and acne scars and heās chubby and he lifts so; much. he lifts so heavy. butch andrew minyard who wears black compression shirts and cargo pants and steel-toed boots. leather butch andrew minyard hanky and carabiner code butch andrew minyard. butch andrew minyard with hands tats and blackout tattoos when heās older and and and. bitten lips and nails butch andrew minyard iām blushing
NEEEEED a scene of jean kissing jeremy against the bike. like they go on a little scenic ride and stop at an overpass. and jean just presses jeremy up against the bike and kisses him with all that hunger we know he has
i need to know what jean thinks of mangos
because mangos fit that specific kind of sweet that i think strawberries and peaches have. not overly sweet and they can have a hint of tartness too. and they are such a fruit of warmth that i donāt think you can eat them without feeling homey. they only grow in warm climates and maybe itās just me, but i think their flavor calls forth summer storms and heat
but most importantly, mangos are their own kind of rainbow and we know how jean feels about rainbows
you can pry starting sentences with 'and' or 'but' out of my cold, dead hands
gabi (she/they) || tired english major, perpetual doc wearer, avid fanfic reader, root beer connoisseur || i fear i have never been normal about anything ever || i love aftg, arcane, and spiderverse
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