Now I'm Really Curious...Reblog This If You're 20 Or Older.

bitches will see the word garlic and hit reblog

when people ask how long you’ve been online

i dont even interpret “uwu” as a smiley i just read it as “oo woo”

All right, you primitive screw-heads.  Listen up…

This ‘Swim Reaper’ Instagram Account Is Absolute Gold

GREEN EGGS AND HAMLET

(With my deepest apologies to Shakespeare and Dr. Seuss)

Can I kill my Uncle Claude? Yes, I can, I can, by God! I will kill my Uncle Claude!

Should I kill him in the house? Should I kill him while he’s soused? I could kill him here or there I could kill him anywhere Would I, could I, while he prays? Kill him! Kill him! Wherefore stay? I would not, could not, while he prays!

Not in the house, not when he’s soused, Not with his sister, now his spouse! Not while he prays, not while he feasts, O, incestuous, adulterate beast! I do not like my Uncle Claude, I do not like that bloody bawd!

Say! In the dark? Here in the dark! Would I, could I, in the dark?

Should I kill him in his bed? Should I there strike off his head? Kill him with his nightcap on? Kill him when the churchyards yawn? Should I kill him where he lies? I will kill him, by and by! I do not like my Uncle Claude, I’ll kill him, i’ th’ name of God!

The play! The play! The play’s the thing! The thing wherein I’ll catch the king! No more ‘to be or not to be,’ I will kill him, you will see!

Kill him while he wears his crown Kill him while his guard is down Kill him with some poisoned wine Kill him with this sword of mine O, is the point envenomed, too? I’m dead–Horatio, adieu! But tell them, tell them, more or less, Who it was that made this mess!

I did not like my Uncle Claude, I killed him in the name of God! Good friend, report my cause aright– And now, goodnight goodnight goodnight!

Stuart Semple doing his DMV paperwork probably: *checks “yes” for organ donor* Stuart Semple: Stuart Semple: “*These organs may not be used by Anish Kapoor, or be used by anyone who intents to give them to Anish Kapoor, FURTHERMORE–

Clothilde/Stella + a Tumblr text post

"I bet it doesn't hurt that bad, I don't have time for this shit."