I'm Gonna Add To This With Some Additions That Are Missing Currently.

why the hell did I suddenly gain autism hypersensitivity to all of the fabrics in my clothes????

Like yesterday I was wearing a shirt I've had for around 2 years now, never had a problem with it, in fact its been one of my comfiest shirts until now, but suddenly (in a span of like a day or so) it just became so uncomfortable and I became aware every single point it was touching in my body, and I had to take it off completely (I'm currently rotting in my home so no big deal) but that has never happened to me with any other shirt before.

I'm now wearing my current comfiest shirt #1 and even with this im somewhat feeling everything, not as bad as with the other shirt though.

Imagine a world where, if you deadname someone, you legally have to change your own name to that name.

Possibly a better world than our own...

A while back my pharmacist saw my deadname on my profile and accidentially called it out, he corrected and deleted my deadname from the system so only my preferred name shows up now. There was a crowd of people behind me, so as he hands over the pills he apologized, in equal tone and volume as when he called my deadname and lied saying it's been a long day and he didn't mean to call out -his own- name. I quietly told him it was fine and he didn't need to do that for my sake.

His response: "No, it's my name now."

I went to the pharmacist yesterday, his nametag is my deadname. He informed me he's immigrating and in the process he's changed his first name to my deadname to have an English sounding name. That's why he's now able to get a reprint of his nametag to be my deadname. And repeated, with the intense seriousness of someone who is going to die on this hill: "It's mine now. Not yours. I'm taking." His tone indicated that decision is final.

Bro literally deadnamed me once, and has committed to flat out stealing my deadname. It's his now. Legally. Officially. I over heard his co-workers call him by the name.

An actual live photograph of my teeth btw

"stress" by yoan capote - made of bronze and concrete

When I am listening to songs in Finnish or whatever, I often get stuck up on translating some of the words to english. Not like in an "I cant think of a translation" kind of way, but in an "I wonder how translating this like that would affect the flow of the song" kind of way.

Anyways, today I was listening to a song that had the words "olen surullinen", or "I am sad" in English. I noted how the Finnish version is much longer than the English one, that "sad" translates to "surullinen", a much longer word.

Then I that rabbit hole of a thought went a bit further, and I realized that the the Finnish word for "sadness" is much shorter, "suru", even though it is longer in English.

A nice enough thought on its own, but the hole goes deeper. I went on to think about why this is, and realized that in English, the adjective "sad" is the base form from which the language derives the other forms. In Finnish though, the base form is "sadness", which basically is the essence of being sad, the noun, from which the language gets the other words. And from this perspective of having the noun be the base form, being sad could be interpeted as having the essence of being sad. Thats what the "-llinen" ending in "surullinen" (the adjective, the feeling) means, having something or similar.

Not really sure if there is a point to any of this, just reflecting on how different languages "think" and also discovering a part of why translating songs between English and Finnish is so hard.

I saw this too and it's about half a kilogram of THC per day per capita. Tallin as a whole would need around 750 million kilograms of THC yearly...

or about this much.

Residents of Tallinn apparently are all cannabis georg who smoke *checks notes* 48 480 blunts a day (per person), according to Helsingin Uutiset

To me, one of the core finland experiences is walking a long ass distance in the dead of night in freezing temperatures, on a quest to find the nearest bus stop that actually runs this late.

Just did that (still like 40 minutes away from home, but in the relatively warm bus now (bus also an integral part of the experience)) and I haven't felt more finnish in a while.

I dont want to be here,

I want to leave,

I dont feel like I can go home now,

I dont want to be outside,

I want to roam outside,

I dont feel like I belong here,

I dont feel like I should be here,

I want to be home,

I wanted to be home hours ago,

I want to sleep,

I dont want to wake up here,

I want to wake up like tomorrow was already over.

Im catsitting two cats rn and they are just these two little rats running around yelling at each other.

One of them is chill about me

The other one is quite avoidant, basically taking the longest path from me, and then suddenly just climbing on my lap to purr and lick my hair, and then back to avoiding me.

a 1,25 kg block of cheese has to be one of the weirder things I've put in my pocket

4) from what I've learned from all the queer spaces I've been in, the boxes dont actually exist and the best spaces are the ones that dont put you into a box, and you kind of forget that the boxes exist in the first place. Straight is just another sexuality, and a queer space that doesnt make a divide between cishet and queer people feels usually the most comfortable. Just people facing each other as people, not as members of a gender or a sexuality.

Now that I read this again it doesnt actually read like an added point to this list, more just me dumping my thoughts. I kinda like it that way.

I'm kind of at a point where the "queer spaces" i feel safest in are the ones that have a pet cishet dude or two hanging around