smokescreen: - well, in my defense, i was left unsupervised!
optimus: - wait, wasn't bumblebee with you?
bumblebee:
smokescreen:
smokescreen: - in his defense, he was also left unsupervised.
knock out: - if a beautiful mech disagrees with me i'll immediately change my views. i have no principles.
bumblebee: - well, maybe you should have principles.
knock out: - you're right, maybe i should.
tfp!human!au
video blogger: «most people only work to secure the future for their children»
optimus: *looks at sleeping bumblebee*
optimus, quietly: - oh, that is so, the best future awaits you.
tfp!human!au:
ratchet: - do you know that alcohol is completely eliminated from the body only after approximately twenty days?
wheeljack: - ..you mean, never?
no one:
vehicons: - if we combine our powers, we can be even more useless than we are individually
tfp!human!au:
arcee: *stretches*
arcee: - ugh, my whole body hurts..
smokescreen: - oh, is it because of dealing with all that paperwork? or because of some intense workout?
arcee: - it's because of my being in my late 20s.
bulkhead: - we're surrounded!
wheeljack: - great, so that means we can fire in any direction!
☕ probably the weirdest associations ever but anyway tfp autobots as things you add in your tea:
🫙 wheeljack - cinnamon
🥛 smokescreen - milk
🥄 bulkhead - sugar
🌿 arcee - herbs
🍯 bumblebee - honey
🍋 ratchet - citrus
🫐 optimus - berries
🧊 ultra magnus - ice
🫗 cliffjumper - sugar syrup
tfp!human!au:
how the 1st episode should have started
ratchet: - what in the actual fuck?
optimus: - ratchet. be careful what you say, there are children here.
ratchet: - well that's the point! what in the actual fuck do the children do on the military base?
tfp!human!au:
smokescreen: - your tattoos look dope, but what do they mean?
wheeljack, grinning: - that i cannot be trusted with two thousand bucks for sure.
smokescreen: - so.. what's the fear of spiders called again?
arcee: - weakness.
ratchet: - ..arachnophobia.
bulkhead: - common sense!