i love how all the hermits outside of boatem call the boatem hermits “boatem” singular
like, there’s no demonym for boatem. it’s just: a boatem from boatem
💞being normal isn’t an option for me with this two💞
im dedicated to Listening and Learning 🙏🙏
ggwp milo🫶🫶 you deserved that sparkly cape for sure. always feel free to reach out to me and talk cycling anytime :)
basically everyone can ignore this, but as someone who got hyperfixated on professional cycling (even if I cannot ride a bike) and is now competing in cycling fanfic events, and I have just done an event for one of the 3 biggest races.
@wtfanworkclassification organised this amazing event, so massive thank you to them, so I thought i'd recommend some of the awesome fics (some stages are missing, which are the ones where I wanted to rec myself haha :)
stage 2 - magic au
“Nature” decided
Wout and Mathieu are stuck together. literally.
General
Mathieu/Wout, background tadej/jonas
I decided magic doesn’t work on jonas
1/1 - 503
stage 4 - mutual pining
E stands for… evenepoel
wout/remco
“I was just talking to Julian.”
“Remco.” Wout is not sure if he should laugh or be concerned.
“Hm?”
“Your screen. It’s turned off.”
Wout and Remco go to a rave. E stands for ecstasy Evenepoel
Mature
wout/remco
Fluff
1/1 - 1317
stage 6 - accidental baby acquisition
A nature break with a purpose
Edo & Wout
“Edo, what is this?”
A pudgy hand reached out and Wout smiled, cheeks and the corners of his eyes crinkling in brief adoration. “Hello, little one,” he cooed, reaching out his own hand and letting the infant grab onto his pointer finger with her whole hand
[or, Edo and Wout (and the adjacent rest of VLAB) become fathers. For VAEFC2024]
General
Edo & Wout
Accidental Baby Acquisition
1/1 - 1165
stage 8 - guilt
You are lucky you’re my boufriend
sepp/adam
I thought I was getting better
But Visma doesn’t want me at half health and I get that
But are you getting better
I don’t know
[or, the lieutenant boyfriends text throughout the length of the 2024 Tour de France. For VAEFC2024]
General
sepp/adam
Texting
1/1 - 900
stage 9 - 5 things
It only counts in Paris
tadej/jonas
Him, below on the cooldown bike, legs gelatin and Jonas, above on his muscular thighs, powerful calves, still smiling so modestly. He looked like an angel. Tadej wanted to devour him like the devil, leaving only the yellow behind for the taking.
[or, five times Tadej finished in the winner’s room and the one time he brought his victory to his own room. FOR VAEFC2024]
Mature
tadej/jonas
Tour de France
1/1 - 2053
stage 10 - accidental marriage
What happens in Monaco never stays in Monaco
wout/jonas, remco/mathieu
Remco smiled out of confusion, throwing up his hands. “Who? Was it, I don’t know, Wout Van Aert? Another cyclocrosser? Even fucking-”
His jaw set at Mathieu’s guilty expression. “You are married to Wout van Aert. The Wout van Aert.”
[or, Wout and Mathieu have to come clean to their boyfriends. For VAEFC2024.]
Teen
wout/jonas, remco/mathieu
I can’t be mean to them
1/1 - 1469
stage 11 - patience
The wait/weight of a dying man
Sepp & primoz
“Go race Ben. Have some patience.”
“I-” Primoz went to retort, but nothing came out. He has had too much patience for one man to bear.
[or, Primoz can’t wait on himself much longer. For VAEFC2024.]
Teen
Sepp & primoz
Waiting
1/1 - 1320
stage 12 - take your fandom to work au
I hope this email finds you well
tadej/jonas
Get a glimpse into the daily life of TDF’s Slovenia based, busy as a bee Administrative HR team!
“Hello, subhuman resources, Jasper speaking”
Tadej wants to say hi but only manages to cough, right after his mic connects,
“Hey, uh. Sorry.”
“Lovesick much today?”
Not rated
tadej/jonas
Alternate universe - office
1/1 - 1543
stage 16 - huddling for warmth
Cervelo versus colnago
sepp/adam
He realised it was just Sepp, standing ominously in the doorway. “What do you want now?” He asked, swiping to another reel.
“It’s cold.”
“Thanks for the revelation,” Adam grunted.
[or, Jonas and Tadej set up their lieutenants, but things don’t go to plan when a snowstorm comes through. For VAEFC2024.]
Teen
sepp/adam
1/1 - 1798
stage 18 - escape
“I’ll leave a light on”
wout/mathieu
!!! detailed mentions of Wout’s crash in DDV + a lot of angst in general !!!
When Wout falls in DDV, Mathieu begins to understand how important Wout really is to him. In the Vuelta, he is there when Wout needs him the most.
“I will keep you safe, you hear me, I will go to fucking Lourdes if I have to. But you will be fucking safe.” he whispers more to any fate-related entity than to Wout.
Really a fic to try and comfort myself, but also for everyone out there who needs it.
Not rated
wout/mathieu
1/1 - 2550
rest in peace white bib white shorts white socks combo you will be dearly missed
gonna write an essay on how minecraft smps is a perfect example of how humans are at fault for today’s politics/policies and utopia cannot even exist in the real world if it cannot in a video game
yeah, looking at you, hermitcraft and dream smp, i’m talking to you two
Saitama Criterium 2022 💛 race
JONAS WTF
📸 leon_van_bon