It Is Finished...

My brain's story process lol

AXIS: Chapter 2

"Aw, man," Micah said. "I am stuffed."

"Good! Then you're who's going to buy, Micah," Ray said.

"What?! Oh, come on!"

I chuckled the ate the rest of my Yakitori (grilled chicken skewers), and flipped open my mini-notebook to my notes while Micah and Ray fought over who was going to pay. By the time I filled out a good page, the boys were up at the cashier's counter. I sat up from my seat and walked away from our table and out the door.

"Hey, Fuu! Where are you going?" Micah shouted to me. I walked over to the counter and set a bag of money in front of Micah.

"I'm going out. Take the money. I'll pay this time," I said as I start to walk away, but then I turned back and called out, "Keep the change!" Then, I waved 'later' to Micah and Ray as they watch me run off into the busy streets. Now, off to my secret space.

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After I threw hundreds of punches and kicks at my beat-up tree stump, I jogged around the hiking trail I always took at this time. Then, I took a short break, lying on a cold rock to cool myself down and drinking some water from a nearby river.

"What're you doing?" A voice asked behind me. I shrieked, almost falling into the river, trying to see who came sneaking up behind me. But thankfully, the person that surprised me caught me right as I touched the water with my fingers.

"Whoa. That was a close one," said Ray. He pulled me up on my feet.

"C-Captain?!" I exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing?" He replied. "I believe that I asked you that question first."

"Oh. R-right... Wait. You know about this place?"

Ray tapped his fist into his palm in realization. "Oh yeah, you probably didn't think I knew about your little training spot? You come here every time we finish up for the day." He's just changing the subject now?! I thought. I paced up and down around the river bank.

"Okay, so you know about this place? The Meadow," I asked again. The Meadow is what I named my training spot. Simple since it was a meadow hidden by the expanse of forest.

"Yep," he replied calmly.

"Since when?"

"Since before you started training by yourself."

I gawked. So, over two years of Ray practically stalking me. My mind was racking with clues of him being there.

"Now that I answered all your questions, mind answering mine?" Ray said. "Why do you push yourself so hard? Are you trying to prove something? Or I am just conceded?"

"I don't need to tell you anything." I spat and started to stomp off. As always, Ray is nosy. But Ray grabbed my wrist, holding me back.

"Tell me. I'm your Captain. I am supposed to watch over you until you've grown up enough to stand on your own. Until then, I am a part of your life. Don't hide anything I need to know."

His face looked genuinely serious. Before, I compared him to my strict father, but now it's different. He is just himself and no other. Even so, it's weird enough that I have a strong urge that I should tell him. Should I? No. I need to stop overthinking this. The real question is, do I trust him enough? I pondered on this question for a moment. But in the end, I sighed a sound of defeat.

"Fine. But it'll sound quite cheesy," I said. "I always practice on my own time because I want to prove to my brother that he was wrong about me. Childish, I know."

"Really? Your brother doesn't like that you volunteered to fight?"

I shake my head. "Nope. He would much rather have me stay in bed all day. He's just like my dad. But I want to protect and fight for our kingdom. I want to fulfill my mother's dream of becoming a general of one of the Six Armies. Maybe even greater than that. And that's what convinced him to sign me up for the academy." Ray looked at me with a surprised look on his face.

"Wow. That's some dream." He muttered. Then he spoke up and asked, "So, what happened to your mother to make her let go of that dream?"

"Um... My mother had an illness that took her life. It slowly but surely drained her energy and lifespan. And especially when I was born. It took so much out of her that she only lived until I was three years old. Twelve years later and I'm here where I am today. I think she would've wanted me to move around than wallow in pain back home. I want to live the life that my mom couldn't. I want to see things in her place."

I shook off Ray's hand and walked back up towards the rock where my things were. A cough escaped my mouth after I took a sip of water from my water cup.

"There's your answer. Thanks for keeping me company, but I got to go back to my dorm." I started sprinting back to the city. Over the logs and rocks before I could find the paved path back. I heard a loud rustle in the trees. I looked up and saw it was Ray jumping away to his place.

Will he be okay? Was it all right to tell him? I don't know if that was too much or too little to say, but I said it anyway. I mean, it's not rare for a dead relative. But this is my mother that we're talking about here. Oh well. No use overthinking this. He was a general in the Eastern Army. Plus, he's pretty much an adult. With those two things in mind, he'll be fine.

I slapped myself on my face with my hands. What the hell? Why am I so worried about his well-being? Just keep moving. It's not a much big deal. Right? I arrived back at the dorm in a bit. I would cool off better there.

why does chapstick have to look so edible

He's learning, give him time

Rambunctious

i'm just tired . . .

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“I’m not only proud of my daughter... I’m proud of my wife too!” ~Maes Hughes

Why did he have to die?!

Born to be...

I have so much to say, But I'm afraid words wouldn't be enough. Actually, I'm afraid of a lot of things. Possibly everything. Everything but one.

I'm afraid of love. I've only learned how to hate myself, So how could I possibly learn to love If I hate myself too much? No matter how good I feel, Whether I'm told I'm beautiful or gorgeous, In the end, I only know how to criticise myself.

I'm afraid of laughter. Do you laugh at me? Or do you laugh at someone else? Is it true or fake? It's much too easy to fake, And reassess choices once made. I can switch moods in the matter of seconds. You probably wouldn't recognise who I was when I shift.

I'm afraid of life. You can make so many mistakes, Fall so many times. Once of them might change your life for better or for worse. That's why I criticise myself. That's why I can't choose choices, But to choose perfection that I despise so dearly.

But I'm not afraid of Death. It's so small, yet so crucial. I don't understand why people are afraid of it. It's coming, so why not face it head on? Is such a fear why most turn to religion and faith? To reconcile themselves that they will be safe? If so, then so be it. As long as it doesn't hurt one's reason to live, Then I'll respect that opinion.

All I want is to breathe in a world, A world that can take it's time and move forward. Not backwards. So, though I'm afraid of a lot of things, I'll continue to see the stories beyond my own. Because that's what I was born to be.