Stepping Out Of The Claustrophobic Space That Was My Home, Into Beautiful Sunlight Which Had Somehow

Stepping out of the claustrophobic space that was my home, into beautiful sunlight which had somehow still always felt melancholic

Dragging my feet down the small street to the trail I had yet gotten to know

To a trail of traintracks, surrounded by greenery and the smell of Summer

I stood there, staring down the tracks that must've gone for miles and could've taken me anywhere

Anywhere but here

Take a deep breath,

Start walking.

One can only go so far from what's home, so I go back to the what's only considered a house

Day after day I make the trip down the road lined with decrepit houses on each side, to an opening in the forest,

To the tracks

I get further each time

Staying out later,

Walking slower,

Taking up as much time as I could.

Seeing those tracks and the forest surrounding it change gracefully throughout the seasons,

Yet never being able to appreciate the beauty of it all

Looking back on it though, I remember

Remember how each season smelt

How the air felt

The colors.

Winter was my last season there,

I had made it pretty far down the tracks by that point

The last step I took before heading back for the final time left me standing at the end of the tracks, a road infront of me and the next set of tracks following after

I stood there for longer than necessary, the scenery ahead of me hardly something to be admired,

I didn't want to have to make that trip back.

I was so tired,

So tired of what kept driving me further down the tracks.