This Sign Left No Survivors

Once you’re the focus of all that attention, it’s addictive.

me waiting four years for rainbow rowell to write wayward son and it finally releases:

happy birthday you bastard man

Thoughts on Wayward Son

Okay, so here I go. Don't know if this will be long or not but I need to express my thoughts.

I read WS non-stop in one sitting and the pace was really fast and kept me going. I really did enjoy it. I love how much the world expanded, the new creatures that we met and the further explanation of the way the magic works is amazing. Also I love Shepard with my whole heart, he was a great addition to the group and helped with their dynamic plus it was interesting seeing them through a different perspective.

Now about Penny, I did enjoy her progress, even though Micah is a shitty person, it does makes sense and it helped Penny mature more, plus I liked her development with Shepard and her friendship with Baz!

Agatha... I didn't like her very much in Carry On but in WS I liked her chapters and how by the ending she kind of accepts that magic is part of her.

Now Simon and Baz, it broke my heart to see how they didn't communicate about their feelings, like they were hoping that by looking at each other the other one would understand what was going through their minds when it obviously doesn't work like that. It's kind of ironic that the magic system is based on the power words have but then they don't use them. It was frustrating to say the least.

I just wish I could take Simon by the shoulders and tell him "You matter, you're worth it, you're so much more than the chosen one, you don't need magic to be happy, you deserve love". It hurts to see Simon feel suffocated but also loving Baz and not telling him his feelings. I wish he would've continued going with the psychologist.

Baz also suffers a lot throughout the book, it's painful to see how much he loves Simon and it's beautiful but also sad how happy Baz gets when Simon kisses him. I loved all the cute moments between them, but then most of the time they went back to square one so that was confusing to me and really emotionally difficult to see.

I did love seeing Simon get jealous but then how is Baz supposed to know this if they don't really talk about it? Again, frustrating.

We all knew that Simon was depressed, but I was hoping the book would show Baz helping Simon get through it, both of them, together. Instead that didn't happen.

Then every time a cute scene/moment (by the way, chapter 41 is beautiful) came I was hanging onto them for dear life. I felt like "okay maybe I can handle it". But no, something else came and they never had a break.

By the ending, I was getting hopeful as Baz saw Simon lying there, thinking he was dead and called him "love". I thought that would've been the point that would made them talk to each other, but no, Simon didn't hear it.

Then Simon carried Baz and didn't let go of him showing how much Baz means to him. I thought okay so maybe this is the time they're finally going to tell each other how they feel in the beach scene...

It's sad to see how Simon does not know how much Baz loves him. It's heartbreaking how Simon thinks Baz would want to stay with Lamb (also fuck him). But I loved Baz's response, that quote is beautiful. Then Simon's reaction came and it crushed my heart. I wish Simon would've shown a small smile or just take Baz's hand or something. It really frustrates me how Baz is hopeful but then Simon shakes his head, that confused me and is what angers me the most, I wanted a little closure, just a little bit of hope and that would've made me happy.

Finally, Penny comes in cutting the conversation and clearly hinting at a third book which I'm anxiously waiting for.

Overall I loved Wayward Son, but I'm unbelievably frustrated and desperate to see them communicate. Just talking would've made everything better. I feel like they talked more at the ball at the end of Carry On than they did during this whole book.

Carry On was the perfect balance for me, when I finished it back in October 2015, all I felt was happiness, I fell in love with it and it was my go-to book for whenever I felt down or reached a reading slump. Now WS just makes me feel sad.

It breaks my heart how much I love them and how much it hurts to see them this way.

I don't think my heart will ever mend from this, at least until the next book comes out.

After investigations

(sorry about the ugly borders)

My biggest question from The Raven King is how did Riko dye Neil’s hair back to his natural color?

Did he un-dye it? Is that a thing? Does Riko know the secret for getting cheap bottle black hair dye out?

Did he take him to a beauty supply store and sort through the hair dye until they found the correct shade? Did they consult with one of the employees about how to cover up dyed black hair with auburn? Seems fake but okay.

It just doesn’t make any sense. Neil’s hair would be a mess. Like a teenager having their first identity crises mess.

Matt seeing Neil for the first time after getting back from winter break: “I know coach said not to say anything, but damn did you stop by a beauty school for the blind on your way back?”

Andrew as their on the roof after getting back from Easthaven: “I don’t know what the fuck is going on with your hair, but thanks for stomping out the ridiculous crush I was harboring on you.” 

september is coming up so here’s your yearly reminder to leave billie joe armstrong the fuck alone

marina tsvetaeva trans by ilya kaminsky

i think anne magills paintings and Edward hoppers are like .. exact opposites. hoppers has the distinct clarity to it, a sharpness in the lines and the angles that contributes to an overwhelming sense of loneliness in almost every one of his paintings. even in his paintings that dont portray isolation there is a feeling of separation

loneliness vs. aloneness

magill, on the other hand, has this haziness to her paintings that emanates a warmth even when the subjects in her paintings are alone.

both paintings feel so comforting, and even in the second one where the girl is alone she is still in the presence of the visceral world around her - there’s a familiarity in magills painting that she captures nicely.

i guess i just think it’s interesting because hopper and magill are two of my favorite artists and they paint similar scenes with very different tones -

I’ve always thought that hoppers paintings are a snapshot of urban loneliness - the distinctness of it, the use of cool colors, the stark contrast between the people and their settings - whereas magills paintings seem almost like memories - their use of haziness and blurriness is exactly how someone wild remember something, indistinct, full of feeling and lacking detail

SEEKING: ORIGINAL SUPERWHOLOCK FANS

Now seems like a good time for this.

So! Let’s get this out of the way first: I’m not here to belittle you, make fun of you, call you cringey, or whatever other shitty bullying behavior is the cool du jour. We don’t roll like that in my house.

No, reality is quite different.

Hi, my name is Nina and I run a hands-on museum at anime and pop culture conventions that details the history of fandom, and if you’re an original Superwholock fan, I want to interview you.

(I also want your gifsets, fanart, fanfiction, prominent crossover theories, etc.—the paraphernalia that make up a fandom.)

Here’s the thing: Superwholock, along with Rise of the Brave Tangled Dragons (which was somewhat concurrent), is the first fan-created crossover megafandom. This is a HUGE DEAL for a fandom curator, because....almost all of you are still alive!! You’re all primary sources!! YOU WERE THERE!! Speaking as someone who’s normally tracking down 80-year-old Trekkies and diary entries from the original Sherlock Holmes fans 140 years ago, do you have any idea, any at all, how EXCITING that is??? When it hit me that I could cut my work on a Superwholock exhibit in half by doing firsthand interviews instead of having to track down old message boards and Fanlore articles, I literally jumped off my bed and yelled. It’s less work AND it’s a better, more accurate exhibit.

Your experiences in Superwholock are part of fandom history. An important part, in fact. And I have the chance to interview and talk to you FIRST HAND. (That’s every curator’s dream. Ask any curator in the world “if you could have an hour to talk to [long-dead person in their field], would you?” and you’ll get an “are you fucking KIDDING me? Where’s the time machine???”)

Questions I’ll ask you will be things like what drew you to the fandom, how it started out, how you (and others) reacted to major development in the parent fandoms, and what your part of the community was like. You can reply in written form, by doing a video, drawing a comic, whatever you like as long as it’s in an archivable format (meaning I can save it to show people your exact words later; don’t let the phrase “anime and pop-culture convention” fool you, I do my best to follow museum archival best practices and won’t show anything without a provenance). This means I’ll also need either your first name and last initial, or a username you’re comfortable appending to your words. If you’re under 18, I’ll also need a parent’s permission if you want to appear on video. And although I didn’t have a chance to do a full filming of the museum before COVID (I was supposed to show at Phoenix Fan Fusion this year and that was going to be the filmed version....sigh), I can provide you with hard copy from conventions that have shown the museum. And my driver’s license, if you’re a minor and your parents are nervous.

I’d like to add here that while some of the museum’s exhibits are, uh....QUESTIONABLE by modern standards of taste, I have never had to kick anyone out for being disrespectful to older works. (I have had a few people giggle over the typewritten zines because the copy quality is so bad, but that’s of the “wow, dinosaur technology” variety of giggle. You’d understand if you saw them.) You will not be put in a position to have to defend yourself from bullying or fallout. A lot of people look at older works and are actually heartened to see just how long the history of fandom is.

If this is a project that would interest you, please EMAIL ME at fandommuseum@gmail.com. And spread the word to other fans you might know!