So Here's A "transgender Activist". Hello!

Hey y’all; would be real interested to hear from anyone willing to share and discuss, about other people’s experiences of transandrophobia specifically in fandom spaces.

I guess I’m just trying to find some more solidarity about the issue since fandom is such an escapism hobby and when that gets tainted, it really, really sucks.

Some of my own experiences include (tw: sa mention | tw: dv):

- Getting told I can’t write realistic gay mlm sex scenes because I’m a trans gay man not a cisgender gay man (but the cisgender woman who said it to me can write realistic gay mlm sex??? 🤔 make it make sense)

- Getting told it’s fetishistic for me specifically to write about male characters in anything but platonic relationships

- Getting mocked after mentioning not being able to watch an episode of a show because there was a male rape scene and as a rape survivor that identifies as male, it was too triggering. Cue the ‘men can’t be raped’ and ‘you’re not actually a man if you say you were raped’ comments. Then having a gif of the rape scene in question sent to me via PM as a ‘joke’.

- Talked about having some empathy for a character who experienced intimate partner violence because of my own experience. Getting told by someone relatively prominent in that fandom that it’s different because those are ‘two male characters’ and that I ‘deserved’ the domestic abuse I experienced with my ex because I’m a trans man who ‘tricked’ a gay man into being with me. (For the record my partner was bi and he knew I was trans before we got together, but fuck me I guess!)

Galaxy brain genderfuck call yourself whatever you want cryptid neurogender fagdyke throwing up pissing and shitting himself at the transfem butch that goes by she/her

If you rrrrreally truly believe in the "evil" of transmascs and their "grabs for gendered power," if you legitimately fear trans men, that's a lot worse for you because it's like, okay, well, good luck with that. I don't really care and no one really should, get over your bizarre personal issues on your own time and then when you're done you can intern for the people agitating for actual transfeminist change in the world since you seem far enough behind that fetching me coffee seems like it might be the zenth of your potential until we can catch you up on remedial praxis.

And don't even start saying I must mean it's ridiculous to be scared of trans men in a bioessentialist way, as though this is me ranking physical strength via AGAB. Any individual transmasc could shoot me or stab me or strangle me with piano wire or indeed, beat me to death with their fists, so could a lot of people, and yet trans men are overwhelmingly supportive allies.

I like it black btw.

idk man, if you're a cis girl who's reblogged/posted over 100+ trans discourse posts, a pretty decent chunk of which is calling trans men who disagree with you sexual predators, and not a single positive post that doesn't explicitly exclude trans men in the last YEAR, and are reblogging rin-tezuka, thicced-witch and cryptid-catnip consistently, while calling other trans women psyops...

I don't think anyone should take a single one of your posts seriously.

matter of fact i kinda think you should never try and speak on trans issues again.

it's amazing how some TERFs will just admit that their primary grievance is being sex pests entitled to pussy and they don't like there being less people to have drunk hookups with.

hate people wanting to shut down conversations about transandrophobia say that trans men and mascs "measurably" experience less violence than trans women and fems

one of the core aspects of transandrophobia is erasure. the rates of violence we face cannot be "measurably" different than anything, because the rates of violence we face are deliberately not measured and erased whenever posssible

I'm nonbinary and transmasculine. I don't tend to disclose my transmasculinity nor my ASAB to anyone because I just don't think it's relevant, I just say "I'm nonbinary". I also have a relatively androgynous face and haircut so people have a really hard time telling what my birth sex was.

Today, I posted something about exorsexism in the trans community, and some random trans woman (and when I say woman I mean woman, late twenties), came into my DMs asking me whether I was AMAB or AFAB. Interesting how she asked "are you" and not "were you", proving that she doesn't quite grasp what those labels even mean.

I told her I wasn't comfortable sharing that because it felt like disclosing that would be boxing me into either "girl nonbinary" or "boy nonbinary" which is what society does to nonbinary people at large. She said she was trans and that "she would never do that", but I still told her I wasn't really okay with telling.

She insisted, and insisted and insisted and insisted and then brought up old posts of mine to... transvestigate me?? Like she was saying shit like "oh you said this and this and this so you must be AMAB" and "wait but you also said this and this and this so you might be AFAB, which one is it??"

I asked her "why do you even care that much about a teenager's genitals lmao" and she immediately lost her shit, called me transmisogynistic for "accusing a trans woman of pedophilia", followed that up with "I just wanted to know whether you were TMA or TME but now it's obvious", and then blocked me.

Sigh. Why can't grown ass adults on the internet go a single day without harassing teenagers and then acting like victims about it?

This is so weirddd... whyyy are people like this??

It actually really bothers me how most people are way more willing to listen to TERFs who claim to be detransitioned trans men who initially transitioned for all the TERF talking point reasons (wanting to escape misogyny, just not loving their bodies enough, hating women/femininity, peer pressure, manipulation by doctors etc) than to actual trans men.

It reminds me of the satanic panic when you had all these people claiming to be former members of satanic cults who went around giving interviews about how they used to kill babies in evil satanic orgy rituals but then they saw the error in their ways, started going to church & now they're on a heroic mission to save other people from going down that road that definitely exists. Meanwhile the actual satanists at the time were doing none of that. But of course nobody ever talked to them. Because the truth wasn't as dramatic.

It's the worst when other trans people do it & spread transphobic conspiracy theories about transmisogynistic trans men siding with radfems, being seduced by their ideology enough to detransition & then become TERFs.

Oh where did you hear about that being a thing that happens enough to be a common trend? From TERFs who claim they used to be trans men but then detransitioned after learning that radfeminism is the truth & the light? Of course, they sure have no reason to be lying about that. Especially when they are random anonymous people online. I can totally see why you'd choose to believe what fucking TERFs tell you about the experiences of your fellow trans people, sure, why the fuck not?

What fucking centrists are you guys meeting? Did you just invent a guy in your head to be mad at?

Master List of Trans Male/Transmasc Privileges:

The privilege to be forcibly married off

The privilege of being raped and impregnated to "correct" their gender

The privilege of not being treated like a rational human being that knows their body by doctors

The privilege of having your existence erased

The privilege to have little to no studies about trans people involve your voice

The privilege to not have access to domestic violence shelters due to being a man (and not allowed in women's shelters) and not having many, if any shelters for men

The privilege of having your transition treated like you're becoming a violent, disgusting, monster

The privilege of having any sort of hormonal transition impossible to be done DIY due to heavy restrictions on testosterone.

The privilege of increased risk of cervical cancer due to reduced access to pap smears

The privilege of having abortion rights not apply to you

The privilege of being over twice as likely to be raped, compared to cis women (51%/21.3%)

The privilege of having almost 5x the chance of being sexually abused as a child, compared to cis women (50%:11.1%)

The privilege that when you are assaulted, to not have access to rape kits

The privilege of not being able to report a hate crime due to barriers

The privilege of experiencing isolation, rejection and distrust due to now presenting masculine

The privilege to have your pregnancy treated as some sort of sick joke

The privilege of a lack of credible research about how to provide adequate healthcare to transgender men undergoing medical transition

The privilege of not being invited for ovarian cancer screenings due to your gender being listed as M

The privilege of doctors not knowing how to check for breast cancer if you've had top surgery

The privilege of an increased risk of AIDS due to the most common PrEP meds such as Descovy not working on AFAB individuals

Others feel free to chime in! The list is ever growing