Reblog To Give Your Headache To Elon Musk Instead

Context: Tim is a dragon that has a human form he forgets to tell the family.

He had a long patrol last night and then did not fall asleep till 7am working on cases (It’s now 9am)

He is walking around the manor not realizing that some of his more inhuman features are showing (sharp teeth, pointy ears, gold eyes, sharp black nails, etc).

Groggy Tim wakes up slowly but surely gets out of bed and shuffles down the hallway dragging his feet. The shuffling down stairs feels like forever and no time at all as Tim makes it down to the kitchen, through half open eyes, he sat at the table slowly munching on the plate that was sitting in front of him. He doesn’t notice their stairs at him. Unconsciously Tim slowly begins, turning into his more human form, losing the almost eldritch features as he became more aware. As he slowly comes to himself, he realizes that he’s the only one eating.

“Is something on my face”

“Tim?”

“Yea, Bruce what is it. You guys look like you saw a ghost” when saying this, Tim had slowly put down his utensils, trying to focus on one task at a time, unsure of his mind, could handle a conversation and eating at the moment.

“Yea cuz, waking up like a lizard is the most normal thing in the world” Jason said in a way that made Tim straighten up and tiki his head at the meaning of the words. He was almost certain that the others knew what it meant to be a Drake because why wouldn’t they. But also why was Jason bringing it up? Instead of pondering over this more, Tim just looked at them all wondering what they were thinking, and said.

“You guys know I’m a Drake, it’s all over the Internet that we’re from a long line of dragons” he stated as if it was the most known thing in the world. What Tim didn’t know was that it wasn’t all over the Internet. The Drake family was actually a very well hidden family of dragons.

“Bruce you let me into your house and your life. I think it is pretty clear. You only let a dragon in if you’re willing for them to stay not like you could ever keep a dragon out.” Tim was sounding a little bit frustrated now huffing in his chair.

“Tim, sweetheart” Bruce paused “The Drake family is not a well known dragon family, and I don’t believe we ever mentioned to your siblings about your family lineage.” The shocked sounds of the family only confirmed what Bruce had said.

“Oh, surprise” Tim said meekly

Consider yourself tagged if you are reading this:

Make this picrew of yourself

Take this uquiz (How Fandom Would See You If You Were A Fictional Character)

Thank you for the tag @machiavellli !

I don’t know what to answer cause my name is NOT gender neutral like at all. If a guy were to have my name people would stare at him weirdly.

Long story short tho I was named after a male stripper doing a drag performance.

Chat it’s not even funny right now oh my gosh I’ve built such a HUGE parasocial friendship with someone, and they just liked one of my posts and oh my gosh my arms are shaking like AHHHHHHHHHHHHDHDGDHD MY IDOL MY IDOL MY MONARCH‼️‼️‼️‼️ THIS IS BETTER THAN MEETING SAILOR MOON IM LIKE FREAKING OUT YOURE SO COOL AND YOU THOUGHT I WAS AT LEAST KINDA COOL THATS SO AWESOME YOURE SP AWESOME WOW AND I GIVE A GIFT CAUSE LIKE YOU DESERVE IT YOUR FREAKING AWESOME AND YOU THANK ME????? WOW THIS IS SO COOL YOU HAVE LIKE MANORS?? THATS AWESOME WOW AND IT MADE YOUR DAY?? GEES MAN THATS RADICAL I CANR BELIEVE IT WOW THIS MAKES MY WEEK MAN I HAVE THE ENERGY TO FACE A CROWD OF JUDGES AND LET THEM RATE MY COOKING GO OFF GORDON RAMSAY IM ON CLOUD NINE RN AND NOTHINGS TAKING ME DOWN

If you see this no you don’t I’m just super happy rn

.👉😠

🫵😤

After they figure out Danny was trying to help, it won’t just be a staged apology. It’ll be 50 roses, petals falling, mild stalking, more punching, a true serenade under the moon.

Tim: *ahem* Danny, I know we just met, but I’d really like to get to know you better. *music softens, and Timmy holds out the roses for Danny* Would you please go on a date with me?

Danny who found out Tim was Red Robin after punching him in the face too: what… I MEAN sure why not? How the hell did I score this sickly pretty boy???

Sorry, Rich Boy

If there was anything Danny hated more than anything, it was doing what Vlad wanted him to do. Especially when he'd done it thinking it was against the fruitloop's wishes and the man gave him that smirk that tells him Danny had played right into the fuckers hands.

So Danny had gotten good at sniffing out a scheme. And, honestly, he didn't need to do much sniffing here.

Vlad had invited him as a plus one to a Wayne (Yes, that Wayne. Brucie Goddamn Wayne.) Gala, meant to take place only a few days from now. Vlad must have suspected Danny would never agree, would have thought it was another attempt for Danny's loyalty where none of his friends could help. Unfortunately for Vlad, Danny was a spiteful fuck and he wouldn't let Vlad go to a Gala full of rich fools alone. Not when Vlad had previously admitted to how he'd gotten his fortune in the first place.

So, there Danny was, keeping an eye on Vlad. At a Wayne Gala. In Gotham, New Jersey. Fuck his half-life.

It was a horrible idea, really. The suit is stuffy, the room is stuffy, and the people are fucking stuffy. He hangs around the food for the most part, only because Vlad keeps coming back to it which makes keeping an eye on the guy somewhat easier. He admits coming was a good idea only when he sees Vlad making buddies with the Wayne troop themselves and that smirk is on his face. Well, fuck that.

He catalogs the group; not including Bruce Wayne there is a scowling child (immediately off the table, he’s not some fucko like Vlad okay), two teenage boys (one of them black and built like a small brick wall. The other a white boy, scrawny as hell, and looking a breeze away from passing out), two teenage girls (one a peppy blonde and the other a ravenette, off to the side laughing together), and a man (big).

Overall, if he had to pick who to go after to cause the most fuss, it’d be the kid. However, he has morals, so he sets his sights on the skinny white boy instead. He’s skinny, obviously, but upon a closer look has some muscle on him that makes Danny less guilty for his choice. Sorry, rich boy, but Danny has a godfather to piss off.

He sets down his drink, walks over, and decks the poor boy in the face. The look of horror on Vlad's face is well worth the absolute confusion coating the entire group.

And, just for the cherry on top, he turns to Brucie Wayne and the fruitloop, "Your Gala sucks and so does your city. Fuck this place, never bring me here ever again Vlad."

You know what I love about the dead tired stardew au? How Tim is literally the perfect farmer. I mean seriously this guy is a chronic, “I can nap anywhere!”, kinda guy. Danny’s just the poor bachelor that saves him from thieves and monsters.

Who’s this brown haired Danny Phantom?? 🤨🤨🤨

this ain't a watch it's an omnitrix !!!

The reason Tim’s shaking is because he’s worried about how much all those dates are gonna cost 🤭🤭🤭 he’s gonna be bankrupt by the end of it

Wip Wednesday?

Phantom floated lazily in a half-circle above them, legs crossed midair, arms tucked behind his head, that too-wide grin stretched across his face like a mask stitched on with mirth and menace.

“Let’s make a deal, Birdy.”

He spun slowly in place, green eyes glowing like dying stars.

“One date for every pitt I take out. I’ll start with the first one as a sign of grace.”

Somewhere in the mountains of Nanda Parbat, a pool began to bubble. Tim didn’t see it, but he felt it. The room chilled. Something ancient cracked apart. The scanners in Barbara computer rang in alarm.

The pit evaporated.

Not drained. Not destroyed. Undone.

Tim’s throat clicked as he swallowed.

Phantom pointed a glowing finger. “That one’s on me. Next ones are on you. Just say when.”

The second pit started to boil.

Jason surged forward, a hand out. “Stop—”

Phantom’s eyes didn’t leave Tim's.

Tim's eyes never left Phantom's

A third pit broke into steam and green fire.

The fourth trembled before erupting, sending up a column of ghostlight and screams. Somewhere distant, Ra’s al Ghul howled.

Phantom’s grin only widened.

Tim exhaled slowly, like it was the only thing keeping him grounded. His fingers curled into the chair arms.

Phantom floated closer. “Those were the ones you knew about.” His voice dropped into something deeper, more ancient. “Want me to handle the ones you didn’t?”

Tim’s mouth was dry. “How many?”

Phantom hovered until they were nose to nose. His voice was velvet, soft as snowfall:

“A lot.”

And then he leaned back again with a chuckle, twirling mid-air. “But don’t worry—I’ll only show you the ones I’m destroying. You just tell me when to stop.”

Tim stared at him, jaw tense. He could feel Barbara's eyes flick between them like a tennis match of insanity. Jason's fists clenched at his sides.

Tim breathed in deep, exhaled once. “...Keep going.”

Screens flickered to life on their own. Oracle’s setup surged with static and data feeds—grainy, spectral images of Lazarus Pits failing, collapsing, boiling away into nothing. Groups of twenty. Then forty. Then eighty.

The room filled with the low thrumming of eldritch static and the faraway screams of something ancient dying.

By the time number (xxx) imploded in a burst of unnatural light, Tim raised a shaking hand.

“Stop.”

Phantom halted mid-spin, upside down, and beamed. “Pleasure doing business with you, Birdy.”

Swans

Imagine pray tell if you will

Tim swanified and angry: *Agreesively honks and puffs up chest/wings at Danny because get away from me?? Who do you think you are??*

Danny sensing something’s up with this swan: WOAH BACK UP WHO ARE YOU???

Tim pausing from where he was just biting Danny: …honk..?

Danny eyeing him suspiciously: …Wanna see my Yeti doctor?

Tim curious and wondering if this guy is sane follows Danny through his strange Lazarus green (but less rotten food smelling, more like lemon or grapefruit) portal because why not? Actions are better than words, especially when you don’t have any!

Or hear me out perchance maybe please

Tim angerly honks and gets defensive: HONK! HKEEEEHHHR!!! (WHO ARE YOU? WHERE AM I? WHAT HAPPENED? WHERE ARE MY ARMS?!?!?)

Danny who understands most languages because ghost stuff plot plot plot: Woah there dude! Just passing by, what happened?

Tim even angrier because he figured out he was a bird, possible swan?, and what? You understand bird? Stupid stupid IDIOT: HHKEEEHRRRRR KERRRRHHH *very intense hissing and honking* (OH LOOK AT THIS WISE GUY, what do you speak bird, *swan version of scoffing* WHAT DO YOU THINK? I JUST MAGICALLY KNOW WHY IM A BIRD?? NO! NO I DONT KNOW WHY! Fucking idiot..

Danny, offended and petty: Well I WAS going to help you but…

Tim getting confused: Honk??? (What is this guy on???)

Danny turns and starts to walk away but peaks his head over his shoulder: I mean if you want help you can follow me, I know a great doctor!

Tim lost and upset: *swan sigh* honnkkkk… (Finneeee…) *starts waddling poorly because he’s got weird ahh legs plus kinda dragging his feet*

Idk I just want a Tim Drake that’s literally a drake, I don’t care if it’s dragon or duck/duck adjacent. GIVE IT TO MEEEEEEEEEE

So real, my dad will be like, “Beebie what’s wrong why aren’t you talking?” That’s cause I gave up lil bro 💀 I’m gonna walk away now cause this isn’t a conversation. This is you yelling at me, and interrupting everything I’m trying to say when you literally asked me to speak five seconds ago