Someone PLEASE Tell The Witch-King Of Angmar That This Little Hobbit Genuinely Thinks It’s Anyone’s

do Ents reproduce by sexual intercourse or by pollination

You ever been in a state where you physically have no energy, but you're bored and socially understimulated so you kind of wish you could just invite people to come over like this:

I love animals that are, like, the opposite of cryptids: we know for a fact they exist and have a clear idea of what they look like because we have photographs and individual specimens, but we haven’t the faintest idea where they’re coming from - they just keep showing up out of nowhere, and the locations of their actual population centres are a complete mystery.

You cannot look me in my eyeballs and tell me "The series really picks up in the fifth book and then they're all bangers, you should try them." I AM NOT READING FOUR SHITTY BOOKS FIRST. WHO HAS THE TIME.

Italian Nirvana

it would explain so much about Gotham economics if it turned out the only employers who pay a livable minimum wage are 1) Wayne Enterprises duh, but mainly 2) all of Gotham's assorted villains.

sure henching comes with shitty working conditions, but the benefits package is crazy competitive. they have dental

yeah my isekai adventure was going pretty well until I accidentally called the cleric 'healslut' and now he won't stop asking what it means

Tony: 50 bucks says I can make Steve blush like a schoolgirl

Bucky: Is this how you became a billionaire, Stark? By charging people for shit you were gonna do anyway?

Tony: …

Tony: I mean, you’re not wrong…