I... HAVE BEEN INCLUDED!

Tucker: We're married.

Danny: What?

Tucker: If anyone asks you and I are married. We've been married for two years. Not platonic roommates. Understand?

Danny: I'm always down for marriage fraud, but can I ask why?

Tucker: *Sigh* We had a big company meeting today with every level employee at the event center the Wayne rent out. Tammy from accounts was assigned to my table-

Danny: Your mortal enemy.

Tucker: Exactly. So she started giving me grief in the middle of our team exercise project. The other four random employees are looking at me all wide eye and I'm getting tired so I say "Is it because I'm gay Tammy?" To shut her up. But at that time, Timothy Drake Wayne was walking behind me and heard me say it. He jumped in to ask what was going on, and I hate Tammy for being so annoying, but I am not about to accuse her of discrimination for no reason. So I said "Oh it was just a joke. Like on the internet." And then when Mr.Drake-Wayne face didn't relax, I blurted out."My husband thinks my jokes are dumb too"

Danny: Tucker....that's not good

Tucker: I know! I started panicking!

Danny: You ramble when you panic.

Tucker: I do, and I did. Before I realized it, I told Mr. Drake-Wayne, this whole made up childhood friends to lover romance between you and I. It was so good he told me to invite you to the office. So we're married. Please go along with it. If I can get Mr. Drake-Wayne's support I can rise in the company so fast.

Danny: Promotions are 50% networking. Alright, sure, what's the worst that can happen?

Five months later

Steph: What's the big emergency?

Tim sobbing:. I'm in love with the husband of one of my employees.

Steph: Tim....that's not good

Based on this addition

To this post

Timothy Drake Wayne, youngest CEO, Times person of the year a year ago (you choose why), and all around impressive business individual is easily recognizable wherever he goes…so long as he’s in a suit. As a CEO Timothy is both a staunch professional and a blatant gen z kid which makes him somewhat beloved and well known by everyone across the county.

But then Tim is wandering around Gotham in a pair of jeans and a flannel over long sleeves and no body takes a second glance.

He’s sitting at the skatepark laughing at “Timothy Drake Wayne funniest moments” compilations with other skaters while they take a break and no one knows the video is about him.

Timothy has to take a public flight and the guy at security checks his ID and then looks up at Tim like “hey you have the same name as that one kid CEO.” And it takes everything in Tim’s power to not immediately respond with “that’s because he is me?” Instead he slaps on the biggest grin and says “what a weird coincidence.”

He’s dressed down sitting in first class because he’s not a heathen and he’s gonna be stuck in a suit for this entire conference. The entire time this lady next to him kept scoffing about his appearance and how he probably never worked for a thing in his life. About how the quality of this aircraft company is going down if they’re letting people like Tim occupy first class. Tim, meanwhile, immediately clocked this woman as the CFO of a company WE was considering partnership with. Lol, fat chance that goes through now.

Tim keeps a suit at Wayne Tower for the emergency meetings he sometimes gets called into. He’s heading into the building when the security of the visiting company shoves him out of the way cause they assume he’s some teen. Needless to say that when he walks into the conference room cleaned an suited up, he found complete delight on watching all the blood drain from their face.

Tim makes fun of Superman because he doesn’t even have to wear glasses to get away with his secret identity. He’s not even trying to hide and people still look over him in a crowd when he’s not in a suit.

Some shady company is trying to buy the skatepark Tim regularly visits and has bribed the GCPD to arrest kids for “loitering” or “trespassing.” Or something. Tim gets arrested one time, sends a snap selfie like “lol got arrested.” and then buys the land the skate park is on and also the company that tried to buy it to build a resort.

There is an entire hashtag full of selfies people have taken with a dressed down Tim out and about in Gotham all captioned with something like “lol, I found our favorite teenage CEO’s doppelgänger!”

Just a reminder that in animated disney movie "Snow White", Prince Florian, a 31 year old man, flirted with a 14 year old while trespassing on her families property, kissed her lifeless body in the woods without the knowledge that she would wake up and then took her away to get married. Again, he's canonically 31 and Snow White is canonically 14.

So, sometime in the middle ages there was an uptik in the demand for beef. The church, who had a ton of cows cuz they were fucking rich, had their own stalls and/or provided stalls with meat. They definitely did *not* have enough cows to meet the high daily demand for beef and, on a related note, they were the ones who prepped the dead for burial in their cemetery.

Love disabled people who just lie about their disabilities to nosy, intrusive questions. Sorry, yeah, I lost my arm in the wash one day. It's funny how that happens! Oh, I got back pain from saving nineteen children from a burning fire department <3

I'm a wimp so I wouldn't play the game if ever it became a game but I would 100% be tricked by this irl

thinking about the time i had a dream i was trapped in an indie horror game set in an old church being hunted by creatures made of stained glass and bloody feathers and tormented by the half-alive statues of suffering saints and also the building itself which was alive and wanted to eat me and in the end i failed to escape and became a lure to draw other people in. the game was called 'host' and i think about it constantly.

I've always had chronic fatigue. I remember being twelve, and an adult mentioned how I couldn't possibly know how tired they felt because adulthood brought levels of exhaustion I couldn't imagine. I thought about that for days in fear, because I couldn't remember the last time I didn't feel tired.

Eventually I came to terms with the fact that I was just tired, and I couldn't do as many things as everyone else. People called me lazy, and I knew that wasn't true, but there's only so many times you can say "I'm tired" before people think it's an excuse. I don't blame them. When a teenager does 20 hours of extracurriculars every week and only says "I'm too tired" when you ask them to do the dishes, it's natural to think it's an excuse. At some point, I started to think the same thing.

It didn't matter that I could barely sit up. It was probably all in my head, and if I really wanted to, I could do it.

When I learned the name for it, chronic fatigue, I thought wow, people that have that must be miserable, because I am always tired and I cannot imagine what it would feel like if it were worse.

Spoiler alert, if you've been tired for a decade, it's probably chronic fatigue.

Once I figured that out though, I thought of my energy as the same as everyone else's, just smaller in quantity. And that might be true for some people, but I've figured out recently that it absolutely isn't true for me.

I used to be like wow I have so much energy today I can do this whole list for sure! And then I'd do the dishes and have to lay down for 2 hours. Then I'd think I must gave misjudged that, I didn't have as much energy as I thought.

But the thing is - I did have enough energy for more tasks, I just didn't go about them properly.

With chronic fatigue, your maximum energy is obviously much smaller than the average person's. Doing the dishes for you might use up the same percentage of energy that it takes to do all the daily chores for someone else.

If someone without chronic fatigue was to do all the daily chores, they would take breaks. Because otherwise, they're sprinting a marathon for no reason and it would take way more energy than necessary. We have to do the same.

Put the cups in the dishwasher, take a break. Put the bowls in, take a break. So on and so forth. This may mean taking breaks every 2-5 minutes but afterwards, you get to not feel like you've run a marathon while carrying 4 people on your back.

Today, I had a moderate amount of energy. Under my old system of go till you drop, I probably could have done most of the dishes and wiped off the counter and then been dead to the world for the rest of the day.

Under the new system, I scooped litter boxes, cleaned out the fridge, took the trash out, cleaned the stove, and wiped off the counter and did all the dishes. And after all that, I still had it in me to make a simple dinner, unload the dishwasher, and tidy the kitchen.

It was complete and utter insanity. Just because I sat down whenever I felt myself getting more tired than I already was.

All this to say, take fucking breaks. It's time to unlearn the ceaseless productivity bullshit that capitalism has shoved down our throats. Its actively counterproductive. Just sit down. Drink some water. Rest your body when it needs to rest.

There will still be days where there is nothing to do but rest, and days where half a load of dishes is absolutely the most I can do. But this method has really helped me minimize those, which is so incredibly relieving.

So I follow the Greek Goddess of Luck, Tyche, (tye key)and I have some pretty okay luck. I have some stories of bad luck, like when I got zooted for the first time, and good luck, like the time I went trespassing with friends. I wanna tell you both but let's start with the less funny one.

A couple years back, I went out with a friend and her boyfriend to check this abandoned rich person house. We snuck in in broad daylight and explored a bit. We were clearly not the first people to do this as everything glass was broken, all the walls were graffiti and many had holes. Some places were not safe to go to and we found a singular room that was marginally in tact. We left after exploring the musty ass basement and as we were getting to the car that we parked strategically elsewhere, we realize we may not have been as stealthy as we thought. Three police cars turn onto the street and down to the court we were just in. We decide to just get in the car and leave and this is where I learn that driver (friend's boyfriend) is directionally challenged. He turns right instead of left (the direction we came from) and goes down a dead end street and I say nothing. He then asks one of us to pull up our gps because he's lost. I tell him he should have turned left when leaving the street and he asks me why I didn't tell him earlier and I tell him that I assumed that he knew where he was going because he'd been here before on multiple occassions.

Reblog if you think asexuality is a legitimate sexuality.

I'm trying to prove something.

Emergency!!

Our 3 person household is suddenly without transportation. The truck is permanently dead. Our housemate will be getting a new vehicle with her pending divorce money at the end of the month, till then we need to uber to get groceries, go to appointments, etc. We also need help with the electric bill + late fee. The below goal covers both of those.

Dm me for proof or details

I will do art for anyone who gives $50+, just message me at my art blog @theartistrans

$47/$567

$creepiecrippl

V: @tab-99