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april’s vibe: hyperfixation as a lifestyle choice

okay, so. i’ve decided april is the month i weaponize my obsessive tendencies. we’re structuring this like a villain origin story meets a Pinterest vision board. no chill, just results. here’s the plan:

DAILY NON-NEGOTIABLES (because autopilot is for airplanes)

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Mornings: Alarm goes off at 6:30 AM. no snooze, no TikTok rabbit holes. i splash cold water on my face like i’m in a montage. breakfast is ✨liquid✨—black tea, hibiscus, whatever. fasting till 3 PM because hunger is just capitalism’s way of distracting me.

-Workouts: Leg day? Arm day? Every day Squats, lunges, push-ups, planks—yes, even the thigh gap sculpt stuff. ugh. cardio is me speedwalking away from my own intrusive thoughts.

-Afternoons: Hyperfocus mode. coding lessons, Neocities updates (my 2003-core html shrine), job applications (two a day, minimum), and drawing my OCs like they’re my emotional support imaginary friends.

-Evenings: Pretend i’m a mysterious artist. video diaries no one will ever see. practicing model poses in the mirror like i’m about to walk NYFW. reading UX/UI textbooks in Italian? Sure. Phone off by 9 PM to avoid doomscrolling into the abyss.

WEEKLY MISSIONS(to avoid becoming a goblin)

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Week 1: Reset. Clean my room, delete 1,000 screenshots, make a moodboard that’s 70% anime OCs and 30% “hire me” energy.

- Week 2: Delulu escalation. Apply to jobs while listening to “I Am the Best” by 2NE1. Code a webpage that’s just a PNG of a frog. Detox Sunday: no internet, just me and my sketchbook.

- Week 3: Break the comfort zone. Post a cringe video diary. Walk like i’m in Black Swan but make it fashion.

- Week 4: Final boss mode. Five job apps in a day. Code a feature that’s definitely overkill. Compare progress pics and pretend i don’t scream internally.

WHY? Because by May, i want to look in the mirror and see someone who’s 10% hotter, 50% more employable, and 100% more feral about their dreams. The kind of glow-up that makes people side-eye me in the grocery store. Skinny toned legend who. Me. Exactly.

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😭

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Slept in, accompanied cuzo to the hospital, came home late, now in bed

7/10 day, see it doesn't take much to make me have a fulfilled day.

I know I just posted this, but writing that made me feel so eerily calm that I got scared for a second, I hear the constant ringing of the night and quiet, the occasional chirps of crickets or other living things I probably don't know about. No music blasting in my eardrums from trying to drown everything to feel functional, just the reassuring sound of snores coming from the room next to mine, my ringlight casting a dim warm light in my room, my blanket feels just as warm it feels silly to have my heater in the room. I feel aware, and I'm loving it.

Please, angels in the four corners of my bed, don't take this feeling away.

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Made my hair! Love the twists🙇🏾‍♀️

I did half of my sudoku puzzle of the day, mostly binged Lucifer while on Pinterest #pip #andriod, and did nothing much except sit from 3 to 8 pm and do my hair.

I could do a face reveal but I don't know 🫣.

I cannot believe this

GOOGLE ADDED 110 LANGUAGES TO GOOGLE TRANSLATE AND MY MOTHER TONGUE IS THERE, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS IS FREAKING AWESOME IM CRYING IM SO HAPPY AHHHH

Yall, tumblr is meant to be used with the low-contrast classic theme, it's like I've opened my third eye or something, everything looks beautiful, authentic and sooo trad (of the true tumblr) I love it

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Wake up - stretch - sink routine - breakie - sketch - bedrot from cramps - skip lunch - binge Lucifer - have broccoli+sweet potato for snack - listen to Nissan Altima by Doechii and Flu by IVE on repeat - drink 3 cups of green tea while watching more Lucifer - dinner - shower - stretch - wind down by listening to IVE empathy album - gonna play LADS rn :)

9/10 day

All pics are mine, so consider this a collage of my day

Who am I kidding, I also enjoyed

OH MY GOD GUYS BELIEVE ME I DIDN'T MEAN TO IM BACK HOME IM SORRY FOR MISSING A DAY I CAN FUCKING EXPLAIN DON'T SHOOT ME 😭🙏🙏🙏

HERE'S ICE CREAM (with moringa and chia seed powder sprinkled on top ☺️) BEFORE BED PLZ LOVE ME 😭💔

All that work for this app to turn the quality to shxt 💔

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Woke up with a bad start but sleeping with a good ending tonight. Here's a 1min vid I just finished editing; the snacks were yummerz regardless.

Please ignore the split second in the intro when the frame wasn't showing.