Masterlist

Fantasy Guide to Palaces and How they Work

I'm always being asked how palaces work whether its downstairs, upstairs or accommodation wise. It is a really difficult thing to explain since there are so many different versions. I thought up a great analogy for it. Treat a palace like a hotel with a whole town living in it, because that's technically what it is. So that's what we're going to do.

Accommodation

Accommodation can be a difficult thing to sort both as a writer and a steward. You might have a palace of 200+ bedchambers in which you must house a staff of 500-/+, a varying amount of nobles, the royal family (of a varying amount) and their own households. When assigning rooms it is best to think of a Russian nesting doll. Start from the inside and work your way to the outside.

The best rooms go to the monarch, their consort and their children/siblings/parent(s). These chambers would include the bedroom, a drawing room/ common area, a privy, a closet (a small chamber that can be used for prayer or work). They would be furnished with the best cloth, the best candles and whatever furniture brought by the resident since most royal courts travelled from palace to palace. They will also have chambers for their personal servants such as ladies in waiting and grooms.

The second best set of rooms would go to the highest ranking nobles/people in the court. These rooms would be less fancy and a little smaller. These would be given to from titled nobility descending from those of Ducal rank (Dukes/Duchesses) or even members of the council such as Thomas Cromwell in Tudor times.

The next set would be considerably smaller, perhaps minus a closet or a drawing room. Given to lower nobility.

The next level of chambers would be smaller perhaps only the bedroom and a common area given to minor nobles.

The last set of rooms would be small and only hold enough room for a bedroom. Servants would have to sleep on the ground on pallets beside their masters.

Any other guests at court would have to stay at off-site locations around the palace in the city. Some nobles at houses around major palaces just in case they arrived late or were kicked out of court.

Room Service

Most palace kitchens were in the lower extremities of the building. They would include an area for food preparation, pantries (rooms where they keep the food) and perhaps even a common area for the servants. Food would be cooked in large ovens, rather looking like pizza ovens or on spits over fire pits. The kitchens would turn out food on order of the nobility and royalty which would be brought to the rooms by the noble's own servants. But since royal palaces are so large and microwaves do not exist, the food would likely be cold when it arrived. For larger, more public dinners, the court would gather in the great hall together (for more on this).

WRITERLY

Fantasy Guide to Feasts, Food and Drink

Picture yourself at a banquet held at the local Lord's castle. The music is playing, the people are chatting and rustling about in their bes

Entertainment

If you hoard over a thousand people into a single building, you will have to keep them entertained or else they might start misbehaving, more than usual. Palaces would be well stocked with ways to keep the courtiers occupied.

Every palace would have a stable where the residents' horses would be chillin'. Some palaces have parkland around them for hunting and picnicking.

Most palaces would have common areas where courtiers would meet to play card games or gossip like a game room.

There would be lawns converted for games such as bowling, croquet and tennis.

Some palaces like Versailles would have indoor theatres and stages for traveling players to perform pieces for the court.

Mediaeval castles would have pits for cockfighting or bear baiting usually outside the main castle on the grounds.

Services

We've spent enough time upstairs. Now lets look at the servants portion of the palace.

The local servants (those who serve at the palace all year round) would typically sleep in mass chambers grouped together according to jobs and gender.

The stableboys would likely sleep in the stable's hay lofts.

The unmarried girls of the castle would be locked in to protect their virtue (a precautionary rule though was frequently broken).

The cooks would sleep near the kitchen in order to get to work early as they could or if they had to rise early.

Stewards (the main boss of the servants) would have the best accommodation as would the other heads of the different groups of servants including the housekeeper, the chef, the head gardener.

Servants who came along with the court would be housed either in close quarters to their masters or on the floor by their bed.

The servants have different corridors and staircases to get around the palace without being seen. These would be smaller and plain parts of the palace.

For @innergoldx sorry it took so long

Not sure who needs to here this.

But you can format Google Docs so you don't have to hit the enter button all over again when you go to Ao3. And don't risk giving potential readers a headache because we can't read paragraph blocks.

What you want to do is on desktop go under Format to line and paragraph spacing and then change the number from whatever it is set at (usually 1.15) to Single. (I'm not sure what this changes going over to Ao3 but this was how I taught it).

And then after that go back again to Format and line and paragraph spacing. But this time hit add space after paragraph.

And now when you paste it over to Ao3 all you have to worry about is adding a scene break.

There is a way to do it on Word but I'm not sure how.

If there is a way to do this on Mobile IDK.

Follow the cabbage’s order 💧

Describing Voices

Inspired by this old post

Words (and definitions) as text below cut.

Words to Describe a Voice

Adenoidal: pinched and nasal in tone

Alto: a low female voice, or a high male voice

Appealing: evoking interest, desire, or curiosity; attractive

Austere: severe, uncompromising, or strict; sober, or serious

Baritone: an intermediate male voice, between tenor and bass

Booming: a deep, resonant sound; prolonged or echoing

Breathy: audible, or excessive, emission of breath

Coarse: harsh, or grating; vulgar, obscene, or crude

Croaky: low-pitched and hoarse; croaking

Deep: low in pitch; sonorous tone

Ethereal: light, airy, or tenuous; extremely delicate or refined

Falsetto: an unnaturally, or artificially, high-pitched voice

Frail: delicate, weak, or fragile

Grating: irritating, unpleasant, harsh, discordant, or rasping

Gravelly: harsh and grating

Guttural: harsh, or throaty; sounds formed in back of mouth

High-Pitched: high in volume and/or tone

Hoarse: a low, harsh sound; husky; weak intensity and excessive breathiness

Honeyed: pleasantly soft; dulcet, or mellifluous; flattering, or ingratiating

Husky: a somewhat hoarse, semi-whispered vocal tone

Hypnotic: inducing, or tending to induce, sleep; soporific

Lilting: rhythmic; light and tripping

Lofty: elevated; arrogant or condescending

Low: quiet or deep

Luscious: sweet to excess; highly pleasing; satisfying; cloying

Lyrical: enthusiastic; effusive; melodious; musical

Majestic: lofty, imposing, stately, or grand

Mellow: mild and pleasant; relaxed; soft and rich

Melodic: sweet-sounding; musical

Mesmerizing: completely engrossing, captivating, or fascinating

Musical: resembling music; melodious; harmonious

Nasal: sounds, either partly or entirely, form the noise

Orotund: strong, full, rich, or clear; pompous or bombastic

Plaintive: sorrowful; melancholic; mournful

Plummy: rich, or mellowly, resonant

Raspy: harsh, grating, rasping, or irritating

Resonant: deep and full of resonance; reverberating

Rich: full, strong, deep, or vivid

Ringing: clear, resonant; reminiscent of bells

Scratchy: uneven, irritating, or grating

Shrill: high-pitched and piercing

Silvery: having a clear, ringing sound

Small: humble, weak, soft, or of little strength or force

Smoky: hazy, hoarse, husky, or raspy

Soft-Spoken: soft, gentle, or mild; persuasive

Soporific: causing, or tending to cause, sleep

Squeaky: sharp, shrill, high-pitched

Strong: robust; powerful; intense in quality

Sweet: pleasing to the ear; delicate, or agreeable

Tenor: an intermediate male voice between bass and alto

Thick: husky, or hoarse; not distinctly articulated

Thin: lacking fullness or volume; weak, or shrill

Throaty: guttural, husky, or hoarse

Tight: drawn, tense, or taut

Weak: lacking in force; soft, deficient, or quiet

Wheezy: with a whistling sound, and difficulty breathing

Words to Describe Tone of Voice

Affected: false, or feigned; pretending to possess

Arrogant: overbearing, assuming, insolently proud

Authoritative: positive, peremptory, or dictatorial

Bloodcurdling: arousing terror; horrifying

Boisterous: rough and noisy, rowdy, unrestrained; noisily jolly

Breaking: changing, or collapsing, suddenly

Bright: animated, lively, cheerful, clever, or witty

Brittle: fragile, frail, lacking warmth; having a sharp, tense quality

Cacophonous: having a harsh, or discordant sound

Caterwauling: long and wailing; a howl, or screech

Cheery: in good spirits; cheerful, or happy

Delicate: soft, or faint; subtle; tactful, or cautious

Dry: plain, unadorned, indifferent, or matter-of-fact

Dulcet: pleasant to the ear; melodious

Ear-Splitting: extremely harsh and irritating; loud

Enthusiastic: lively, ardent, eager, or passionate

Faint: soft, weak, feeble, or slight; lacking clearness or volume

Feeble: lacking in force, strength, volume, and distinctness

Flat: without modification or variation; without vitality

Forceful: powerful, vigorous, or effective

Frank: direct and unreserved; straightforward; sincere

Gruff: low and harsh; hoarse; rough, brusque, or surly

Hesitant: wavering, irresolute, timid, or unpersuasive

Insincere: lacking sincerity; sarcastic; hypocritical

Irreverent: lacking respect; flippant

Monotone: single tone, without harmony or variation

Patronizing: offensive and condescending

Pedantic: overly concerned with details and rules

Petulant: impatient irritation; annoyed

Piercing: loud, or shrill; sarcastic, or caustic

Pompous: ostentatious display of self-importance

Pontificating: to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner

Pretentious: making an exaggerated outward show; ostentatious

Raised: increased in volume

Raucous: harsh, strident, or grating; rowdy, or disorderly

Respectful: showing deference; politeness

Rough: harsh to the ear; grating, or jarring

Sarcastic: using harsh or bitter derision or irony

Screeching: harshly shrill

Serious: grave, somber, earnest, or sincere

Singsong: rhythmically monotonous cadence or tone

Smug: contentedly confident in superiority or correctness

Snarky: testy or irritable; having a rudely critical tone

Snobby: condescending, patronizing; snobbish

Soft: low, or subdued; gentle and melodious

Sotto Voce: in a low, soft voice, so as not to be overheard

Stilted: stiffly dignified or formal; pompous

Strangled: choking, or stifled; gradually cut off

Sullen: gloomy, irritated, morose, or malignant

Trembling: shaking, as from fear, excitement, or weakness

Unapologetic: bold, and showing no regret

Upbeat: optimistic, happy, or cheerful

Warbling: with trills, quavers, or melodic embellishments

Wavering: unsteady, shaky, or fluctuating; begin to fail

Whiny: complaining, fretful, or cranky

Whisper: to speak with soft, hushed sounds

The New Yorker

How Tumblr Became Popular for Being Obsolete

The social-media platform’s status as a relic of the Internet has attracted prodigal users as well as new ones.

positive press? for tumblr???? my gd.......

switch up your verbs (part one) ~

walked - hiked - moved - shuffled - toddled - sauntered - ambled - tiptoed - meandered - strolled

laughed - chortled - chuckled - giggled - snorted - guffawed - howled - snickered - shrieked

wanted - ached for - wished - craved - coveted - fancied - pined - aspired

ran - sprinted - galloped - scampered - bolted - trotted - dashed - raced - jogged

jumped - bounced - hopped - leapt - hurtled - vaulted - barged - bounded

Requests

I am now officially taking requests for the following characters/ships and am not opposed to dark proposals. I do NOT write smut.

HARRY POTTER

Tom Riddle

Draco Malfoy

Tomione

MARVEL

Steve Rogers

Loki

WWE

Seth Rollins

Roman Reigns

Finn Bálor

Randy Orton

“The Fiend” Bray Wyatt

VAMPIRE DIARIES/THE ORIGINALS/LEGACIES

Niklaus “Klaus” Mikaelson

PEAKY BLINDERS

Thomas “Tommy” Shelby

Arthur Shelby

GOTHAM

Jim Gordon

REVENGE (ABC)

Daniel Grayson

This is glorious and even thought it doesn’t fit in the range of all the paranormal, I MUST share

It works like this: You tell Kitestring that you’re in a dangerous place or situation, and give it a time frame of when to check in on you. If you don’t reply back when it checks your status, it’ll alert your emergency contacts with a custom message you set up.

It doesn’t require you to touch anything (like bSafe) or shake your phone (like Nirbhaya) to send the distress signal. Kitestring is smarter, because it doesn’t need an action to alert people, it needs inaction.

MORE INFORMATION

Pls Daemon’s comment about baby baelon being “Heir for a day” was so out of pocket I literally gasped