Be High Maintenance To Be Low Maintenance: A Checklist

Girly Comfort Movies

Little collection of my favourite comfort movies (take with a grain of salt lol) <3

Legally Blonde (1 and 2)

the devil wears Prada

The Princess Diaries (1 and 2)

Little Woman

Clueless

Mean Girls (1 and 2)

Pride & Prejudice

Roman Holiday

Uptown girls

Marie-Antoinette

The Virgin Suicide

10 things I hate about you

Lady Bird

Jennifer’s Body

how to lose a guy in 10 days

American Psycho

A Cinderella Storie

Emma

Watching the detectives

La La Land

Peters to Juliette

Bling Ring

Fight Club

Dead poets society

13 going 30

The Notebook

Breakfast at Tiffanys

Sex and the city

Dear John

The breakfast club

Mamma Mia

Monte Carlo

Black Swan

Girl Interrupted

Pearl

Bridget Jones (ty @dionysus-drabbles 🫶🏻)

If you guys have any more suggestions and/or recommendations (maybe some shows and series as well!!), please feel free to share them with me in the comments!! <33

How to feel more feminine 🎀🩰🫶🏼

For the longest time I’ve been trying to find ways to feel and look more feminine and I’ve found some things that really helped me achieve this so here are my tips. I want to remind y’all that you DO NOT have to be feminine. This is what I personally want to give off but please never feel pressured to be more feminine this is for anyone of any gender and sexuality to feel more feminine ONLY if that is what they want. I love u and u are beautiful regardless.

Doing my nails

Going to bed in cute clothes

Keeping my room clean

Candles

Wearing one necklace at a time instead of a bunch at once

New makeup look to make my eyes pop

Thinning my eyebrows

This does not apply to everyone but I found that hoop earrings (specifically big ones) don’t match me and made me look less feminine for some reason

Lip combos

I have big brown eyes and I had blonde and light shades of brown hair for a while which made my eyes less noticeable, going back to dark brown made my eyes pop SO much more again

Sweet perfumes

Lip gloss or a lipstick with some shimmer is something else

Lotion (even though I barely put on lotion)

Buying more bags and carrying one with me always

Looking at least somewhat put together regardless of where I’m going

Looking cute at home

I always say this for everything but jewelry especially gold or a mix of silver and gold (if u do it right)

Long boots make me feel like the baddest baddie ever

So random but keeping a cute makeup bag in my bags make me feel so girl 🩰

That’s it for now babes

Feel free to message me with things you need tips on and I’ll make posts abt it if I can I love making these posts so much

Love u 🫶🏼

Xo, Ary 💋

be busy. busy not checking messages. busy reading those books you never started or finished. busy having a good night of sleep. busy taking care of yourself and your skin. busy moving your body. busy helping your community. busy reflecting on your life and what you can improve. busy doing things aside from the capitalistic viewpoint of “productivity.” busy slowing down.

january workout plan

january 1: 9 minute cardio warmup + 20 minute pilates booty + 12 minute stretch

january 2: 20 minute pilates + 20 minute yoga

january 3: 10 minute warm up + 15 minute back + 12 minute stretch

january 4: 10 minute cardio warmup + 20 minute abs & booty pilates + 12 minute stretch

january 5: 30 minute glutes + 15 minute leg stretch

january 6: 10 minute mobility warmup + 10 minute booty + 12 minute stretch

january 7: 10 minute cardio warmup + 20 minute pilates + 12 minute stretch

january 8 - january 11: hospital stay for me (do what you want here, just stay active!)

january 12: 20 minute metabolism boost + 15 minute pilates

january 13: 10 minute cardio + 15 minute legs & booty pilates

january 14: 15 minute cardio + 15 minute pilates abs

january 15: 15 minute cardio pilates + 20 minute yoga

january 16: 15 minute pilates arms + 10 minute upper body stretch

january 17: 15 minute booty & core pilates + 20 minute yoga

january 18: 10 minute cardio + 15 minute pilates + 10 minute yoga

january 19: 25 minute yoga

january 20: 40 minute pilates

january 21: 10 minute cardio warmup + 30 minute booty & legs pilates

january 22: 10 minute cardio + 30 minute upper body & abs pilates

january 23: 39 minute pilates

january 24: 48 minute pilates

january 25: 10 minute cardio + 30 minute lower body pilates

january 26: 55 minute pilates

january 27: 15 minute cardio + 30 minute pilates

january 28: 42 minute abs & arms pilates

january 29: 42 minute pilates

january 30: 45 minute vin to yin yoga

january 31: 20 minute mobility & stretch

𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

it’s a hard pill to swallow, but sometimes, you’ve got to step into a role you never signed up for. maybe your mom wasn’t the nurturing, protective figure she was supposed to be. maybe your dad let you down in ways that left scars. maybe your friends only stuck around to take, never to give. the truth? you can’t wait for someone to come and save you. you have to become your own mother.

ask yourself:

if your child was in your shoes—stuck in a bad relationship, getting treated like crap— would you tell them, “stay”? or would you say, “you deserve better than this”?

if your child was chasing their dreams but struggling, would you mock them? no. you’d guide them, push them to be their best. you’d discipline them with love and cheer them on with pride. now, apply that same energy to yourself.

be that mom who says: “get your shit together because you deserve the best life possible.”

but also the mom who says: “it’s okay to rest, i’ve got your back, and i’m proud of you.”

start showing up for yourself the way you needed someone to show up for you. and yes, it’s sad. sad that we even have to do this. but it’s also empowering to realize you can.

personally, here’s my story.

my mom never cared to take my pictures as a kid nor cared if a haircut made me happy or not, it was literally everything up to her convenience. it hurts now because i would’ve loved to look back and see those memories. but i don’t have them. i can count the photos of my childhood—20 pictures in 17 years. insane, right? so, i made a promise to myself: from now on, i will document my life. i won’t delete my photos. i’ll make sure there’s a record of who i was, what i felt, what i achieved. and when i have kids? you bet i’ll take pictures of them. i’ll curate their childhood with care because i know what it feels like to not have that.

but being your own mother isn’t just about the pictures or the memories. it’s about analyzing everything you missed out on and providing it for yourself now. it’s about being selfless enough to let go of bad habits that hold you back. it’s about kicking toxic people out of your life the way a mom would protect her child from bad influences. it’s about prioritizing your healing, even if it’s messy and uncomfortable. you have to heal your inner child. that 5-year-old who was bullied, that 13-year-old who was treated like shit in her first relationship, that 7-year-old who dreamed big but was told she couldn’t they’re all still inside you, waiting for someone to nurture them. and unfortunately, no one else is going to do it for you. no one else is going to come and fix the damage.

i made a pact with myself: when i have kids, i will raise them so well that they won’t ever need to “heal their inner child” at 17 or 18. they’ll be whole. they’ll be loved. they’ll know their worth from the start. but for now, i’m doing that for myself. and you need to do it for yourself too. because at the end of the day, the only way to heal is to become the person you needed all along. become your own mother.

what is the inner child?

the “inner child” is the part of you that holds your early experiences, memories, and emotions. it’s the 5-year-old you who loved to laugh but was scolded for being “too much.” it’s the 10-year-old you who dreamed big but felt dismissed. it’s the teen you who felt heartbreak for the first time but didn’t know how to process it. your inner child carries the wounds, fears, and unmet needs from your past, but also your natural creativity, curiosity, and joy. healing your inner child means reconnecting with this version of yourself, giving it the love and understanding it never received, and releasing the pain it has carried for years.

how do you heal your inner child?

1. journaling: dialogue with your inner child

dedicate a journal specifically to your inner child. write letters to them, like:

“dear [your name at 5/7/13], i remember when you felt [insert memory]. i’m sorry you went through that, but i’m here now, and i’ve got you.”

let your inner child respond. write as if you’re that younger version of yourself—pour out your fears, dreams, and questions. this process can uncover emotions and patterns you didn’t realize were affecting you.

2. therapy: safe exploration with a professional

a therapist (especially one trained in inner child work) can help you identify wounds and patterns from childhood. they’ll guide you in understanding how your upbringing shaped your beliefs about yourself and the world. therapy also gives you tools to reframe those beliefs and meet your emotional needs.

watch “dear zindagi” lol

3. look at old photos and memories

revisit old photos, journals, or artwork from your childhood. don’t just look at them—analyze them. (i wish i could d this but im stuck with 20 photos so… 😭) what do you notice in your younger self’s eyes, body language, or expression?

• ask yourself:

• what was i feeling here?

• did i feel safe? loved? excited? scared?

• what did i need in this moment that i didn’t get?

• use this reflection to understand your inner child’s unmet needs.

4. create new positive memories

your inner child is still alive within you, and they crave fun, love, and freedom. do things your younger self would’ve loved but never got to do: buy yourself a toy you always wanted. go to an amusement park or build a pillow fort. dance around your room like no one’s watching. this isn’t childish it’s healing.

5. practice reparenting

treat yourself as if you were your own child. when you feel sad or scared, don’t ignore it.

ask yourself: what do i need right now? and give it to yourself.

be the loving, supportive, and protective parent your inner child deserved.

6. identify triggers and patterns

notice when you’re acting out of a place of childhood wounds.

for example: do you get overly anxious when someone’s mad at you? do you seek validation in toxic relationships? trace these behaviors back to your childhood.

were you taught that love is conditional? did you have to “earn” attention by being perfect? once you identify the root, you can start rewiring your responses.

7. inner child meditations and visualizations

find a quiet space and imagine your inner child sitting across from you. visualize yourself comforting them, hugging them, and telling them they’re safe. remind them: “you don’t have to be scared anymore. i’m here for you.”

8. nurture yourself daily

make self-care non-negotiable. eat foods you love, sleep well, move your body, and spend time doing things that make you happy. when you treat yourself with care, you show your inner child they’re worth it.

9. forgive

healing isn’t about excusing those who hurt you. it’s about releasing the hold they have over you so you can move forward. write a forgiveness letter—not for them, but for yourself. (they don’t deserve the love i’m sorry)

“i release the pain you caused me so it doesn’t control me anymore.”

10. promise to break the cycle

vow to yourself (and your future children if you want them) just cause your grandma bleed on your mom and then your mom passed it to you does not mean you will make your future kids life miserable too. the generational trauma must break with you. your future child does not deserve it and so your inner child protect you inner child and when you have a child of your own be the best mother possible, i personally would love to make my future kids childhood so memorable and happy that they will feel the need to comeback and relive their childhood that’s the kind of childhood i want to give them

“i will not let this pain define me. i will create a life of love, joy, and freedom.”

healing your inner child isn’t easy, but it’s life-changing.when you reconnect with that innocent, wounded part of yourself, you’ll find that the love and peace you’ve been searching for has always been within you.

11. foster your inner child’s dreams

when you were a child, your dreams weren’t influenced by fear, rejection, or societal pressures. you dreamed with your heart wide open, purely and authentically. reconnecting with those dreams can heal the part of you that felt unheard or invalidated back then.

a. reflect on your childhood aspirations

• sit down and ask yourself:

• what did i want to be when i was 5? 10? 13?

• what made me happiest back then?

• what did i lose interest in because someone told me i wasn’t good enough?

• write down every dream, no matter how “unrealistic” it seems.

hint: those childhood dreams often point to your soul’s calling.

b. start chasing those dreams now

• even if your dreams have evolved, find ways to honor the essence of them.

• wanted to be a singer at 13? start singing lessons or recording yourself.

• wanted to help people? explore careers like psychology, teaching, or coaching.

• don’t hold back.

it’s not about being perfect, it’s about reconnecting with the passion your younger self had.

c. create small wins for your inner child

• maybe 8-year-old you always wanted to paint but never got the supplies. buy yourself a beginner’s set and paint, even if it’s messy.

• maybe 6-year-old you wanted to be a dancer. take a fun dance class and twirl like no one’s watching.

• small wins send the message to your inner child that they are finally being prioritized.

e. validate your inner child’s feelings and failures

• remind yourself:

“it’s okay that 10-year-old me struggled with making friends. i was just a child trying my best.”

• instead of shaming yourself for past actions, honor them.

every mistake was a step toward becoming the incredible person you are now.

f. use your dreams to shape your future

• your childhood passions aren’t just hobbies—they’re roadmaps to your authentic self.

• align your current goals with your inner child’s desires.

• if 7-year-old you dreamed of making people smile, maybe your career or side hustle should reflect that.

• if 12-year-old you loved storytelling, find ways to write, act, or share your voice.

fostering your inner child’s dreams doesn’t just heal the past—it builds a future that feels authentic to you. every time you take a step toward those dreams, you’re telling your inner child: “you were always worthy. your dreams always mattered. and now, i’m making them come true for you.”

⋆ Small achievable goals to change your entire life in 2025 🌸⋆.ೃ࿔.⊹𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋

ׂ╰┈➤ Start cooking more of your meals at home. Incorporate more healthy ingredients in your meals and/or disguise them in delicious recipes!

ׂ╰┈➤ Start working out regularly, at the gym, in the park or just in your bedroom. Any form of activity counts!!

ׂ╰┈➤ Start drinking more water!!!

ׂ╰┈➤ Establish an easy morning and evening routine that you can do everyday

ׂ╰┈➤ Never skip skincare or basic hygiene like showering or brushing your teeth

ׂ╰┈➤ Fix your sleep schedule and sleep 7-9 hours a night

ׂ╰┈➤ Choose to spend less time on your phone and more time outside/with family and friends.

ׂ╰┈➤ Uninstall harmful social media apps

ׂ╰┈➤ Start being productive everyday – read, journal or practice your hobbies more often!

ׂ╰┈➤ Take yourself on solo dates! Everybody underestimates this so much, but I promise it makes such a difference in your mood. Go to the spa or salon, take sunset walks, read at the corner cafe while enjoying a warm pastry!!

ׂ╰┈➤ Start romanticising your life! Candle lit dinners with your family, spa and rest days, buying flowers or that cute dress or doing face masks while reading at night could make such a great difference!!

ׂ╰┈➤ Start complimenting people more often and saying kind things to strangers!

ׂ╰┈➤ Clear out your wardrobe! Find your desired style and get some cute key pieces that go well with anything. Donate old clothes that you aren't wearing anymore!

ׂ╰┈➤ Of course, looks ARE NOT everything in life, but you should try to look as put together as possible in every situation. Use clothes and hairstyles that fit you well, wear perfume, jewelery and accessories, try to have well maintained nails and skin

ׂ╰┈➤ Become well organised by always preparing for a situation ahead of time

ׂ╰┈➤ Always experiment with cooking or baking, with your make up/hairstyle, and try out new places or hobbies too!

ׂ╰┈➤ Stop worrying about other people and their opinions. Cut out all the negativity in your life, they might be ruining your progress!

ׂ╰┈➤ Try to become more confident each day, being confident makes the biggest difference in your life of them all!

ׂ╰┈➤ Stop being so hard on yourself! Life is not a race so please remember to enjoy every moment and take it easy and slowly. Results will not be visible immediately but change is on the way and you know it too. Good luck!! <33

how to prepare for 2025 𐙚

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as im writing this, there are only 2 days left in the year. i spent a couple of days preparing for the year, and this is what i have decided to do! so grab ur journal(or just a notebook) and write these questions down with me…🎀

#1 revise.

revise your goals at the beginning of 2024, and will you be bringing them in 2025? what have you achieved? what will you leave behind? what can you do to achieve these goals next year? what did u love from this year that u can bring to 2025? 

little tip: for next year, let's make it a habit to write down small goals(e.g. drinking 2L of water every single day)every month, it will eventually become the norm for u. this will keep you more focused & determined. i also recommend using the app ‘habit’ it is SO helpful.

#2 aspirations/resolutions.

grab a piece of paper and brainstorm ideas on who you aspire to be for the up and coming year. make sure u make these goals believable. an example of a believable goal is to hope i lose 10kg, not lose 30. even tho its possible, its never a good idea to be overconfident, because it would lead to burning out.

little tip: make a vision board, a couple of days ago i made one for 2025, and it was so therapeutic !!! i also recommend putting it somewhere u will always be looking at it.

#3 do’s & donts 

i used to always do this, so i just primarily write down the habits i acquired this year that i want to continue and the ones i dont. i write this on a piece of paper(basically a list).

#4 mistakes.

if u have made mistakes in 2024, you have the choice of either making the same mistake over and over and over again, or learning from the mistakes and the choices u made that led up to it. 

#5 regrets

what did you regret this year, and how can u make up for it in 2025? usually when people regret doing something, they fall back into bad habits, what can you do to prevent that from happening to you?

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

HABITS TO IMPLEMENT BEFORE THE END OF THE YEAR ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹

DAILY AFFIRMATIONS

You can choose whatever time you’d like to say positive and affirmative statements to yourself. When saying affirmations, use the first person and present tense. E.g I am healthy, I take care of myself, and I am strong academically. 

Affirmations are so helpful because our brains struggle to tell the difference between imagination and reality. So, when we visualise ourselves doing something that's not actually happening, it stimulates the brain areas as if we were actually experiencing it.

So, repetitive affirmations will encourage your brain to treat it as fact. While this only works to an extent, it does help with self-sabotaging thought actions and thought patterns. 

EATING MINDFULLY

Eating mindfully is the practice of when consuming anything, you put your full focus on that meal. There are no devices that may distract you, you’re eating slowly and paying close attention to how different meals make your body feel. 

To eat mindfully, focus on the time it takes for you to finish your food. Is it enough time for your body to give signals about your meal? To chew thoroughly? Another thing is to turn off and eliminate any distractions. Such as being on any devices or multitasking. 

Eating too quickly means that your body may not have enough time to tell you that it's full. When you eat mindfully, it's easier for your body to register when it's full. Furthermore, it's easier to distinguish between true hunger and non-hunger triggers for eating. 

CREATIVE OUTLETS

For a lot of us, 2024 was a stressful year. We’re constantly hustling and not letting ourselves process what's happening in and around us. Having a creative outlet helps us to release and detach from those emotions. It allows us to experience that feeling, but leave it all behind in the end. 

Some examples are painting, clay artwork, creative writing, designing, sewing, crocheting and music. There’s a lot more you could do, but ultimately you have to do what's best for yourself. 

LEARNING SOMETHING NEW EVERYDAY

At least one thing each day: aim to learn something completely new to you. Other than the fact that you are learning something new, it allows for your curiosity to grow and expand outside of your typical education institution. With curiosity, comes with the skill of being able to explore complications and come up with solutions. 

There are many ways you can learn, but I think the best way is by coming up with your questions in an area you’re unfamiliar with and then looking for an answer to your question. 

My favourite way has to be watching video essays. Doesn’t always have to be social commentary, but anything that seems interesting enough for me. 

COMPLIEMENT-A-DAY

I love receiving compliments from strangers. It leaves the widest smile on my face and I swear I feel so much lighter like I’m floating around. However, I never think to give a compliment to someone else who I don’t know. So, whenever you see the cutest outfit or the perfect lip combo, make sure to say it!

For those who may be shy in those kinds of interactions, practice saying it in your head. You don’t have to say it out loud to them, but thinking positively of other people will reflect on how you think about yourself. 

That is it for this post, thank you for reading until the end ♥︎ Until next time, take care of yourself ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹

the it girl’s spring cleaning

phone reset

delete old contacts and messages

go through social media following

delete unused apps

go through photos

set a new wallpaper

add widgets for reminders, weather, battery, etc.

delete old songs and add new ones

environmental reset

clean your bedroom (vacuum, dust, put clothes away, etc.)

sort through and donate old clothes

organize your makeup, skincare, etc.

wash or change your bedsheets

rearrange your bedroom

open your windows and curtains to let fresh air in

get outdoors

clean your home with fresh scented products (lemon, lavender, etc.)

physical reset

try a new workout routine

get some new outfits

do a face mask

exfoliate and shave

oil your hair or do a hair mask

try a new hair color, cut, or style

do your nails or get your nails done

get some fresh makeup and try a new makeup routine

do a lip mask and scrub

mental reset

start journaling or try some new prompts

do a refreshing meditation

try a new yoga practice or workout

read instead of scrolling

put a time limit on your phone usage

reset your sleep schedule