Is This The End Or Just Beginning

just a friendly reminder that this photo of jamie campbell bower does, indeed, exist…

double cheeked up, on a thursday afternoon hella ass the sun is still out-

Dear Reader,🌹

I am Dr. Mohammed Aldeeb, a dedicated medical professional specializing in emergency care, hailing from the Gaza Strip. 🇵🇸 ✌🕊

For years, I poured my heart and soul into my work at Al-Shifa Hospital, tending to the wounded and the ailing with compassion and skill.😀

However, the ravages of war tore through our lives😓, forcing me to abandon my cherished home and the familiar walls of the hospital where I once found solace😥💔.

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Donate to Help Us Escape the Ravages of War: Emergency Evacuation Fund, organized by N ALDEEB

Help Us Escape the Ravages of War: Emergency Evacuation Fund … N ALDEEB needs your support for Help Us Escape the Ravages of War: Emergen

Leaving behind the echoes of laughter and camaraderie, I embarked on a painful journey southward, bidding farewell to the streets where I grew up😓💔, the corners where I sought refuge, and the colleagues who felt like family. Memories of my formative years and the countless lives I touched during my tenure at Al-Shifa and other medical facilities flooded my mind😥, as I struggled to come to terms with the sudden upheaval.

Despite the adversities that besieged me, I persevered in my pursuit of healing. My determination led me to Al-Azhar University, where I embraced the role of a teaching assistant, imparting knowledge to aspiring medical students with unwavering dedication. Dreams of specializing in internal medicine beckoned me back to Al-Shifa Hospital, but alas, the brutal onslaught of war reduced it to rubble, shattering my aspirations in its wake.

In the chaos and carnage of conflict, I sustained injuries, and the sanctuary of my home was obliterated, leaving my family and me destitute and displaced. Yet, amid the ruins, a flicker of hope persists. At Al-Aqsa Hospital, I continue to extend a helping hand to those in need, drawing strength from the resilience instilled in me through years of education and service.

Today, we find ourselves sheltering in a humble tent, stripped of our possessions and livelihoods. The loss of my job, my home, and the comforting presence of my loved ones weighs heavily on my heart. Nevertheless, I refuse to surrender to despair, clinging to the belief that brighter days lie ahead.

It is with a heavy heart that I reach out to you, dear reader, seeking assistance in securing safe passage for myself and my family from the turmoil of Gaza. With your kindness and generosity, I hope to reclaim the path to realizing my medical vocation, enabling me to provide for my loved ones and contribute to the healing of our wounded world.

Your compassionate aid would mean the world to me and my family.

With gratitude and hope,

Dr. Mohammed Aldeeb

Gaza Strip

WhatsApp: 00972599095244

I hope this version captures the depth of your story and resonates with your audience. Let me know if you need further adjustments!

Vetted by :

@90-ghost : the verification

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Donate to Help Us Escape the Ravages of War: Emergency Evacuation Fund, organized by N ALDEEB

Help Us Escape the Ravages of War: Emergency Evacuation FundT… N ALDEEB needs your support for Help Us Escape the Ravages of War: Emergen

Thank you for the tag! I'm forcing myself to take a study break and do this, so thank you for helping me take a study break.

Last Song: Not technically a song, but I have my vinyl of Andy Biersack reading Edgar Allen Poe stories on, and mask of red death is playing right now. Song wise Pass the Nirvana by PTV - I really like their new album. I'm praying for a Toronto tour date again

Last Show: Supernatural bc I refuse to actually finish it.

Currently watching: I usually watch multiple shows at a time tbh. Right now, I'm watching Stranger Things, Hunters, Supernatural and Boy Meets World

Currently reading: Nothing! I just finished Lost Souls by Poppy Z. Brite the other day though

Current Obsession: Acorn and Crow's tiktoks!

I don't really have anyone specifically to tag, so I tag anybody who wants to do it

Tagged by: @kaitaesupremacy @burninlovebutler @girlnairb

Thank you, my loves! 💋

Rules: Tag 9 people you want to know better!

Last song: I Think We're Alone Now - Tiffany

Last show: Evil

Currently watching: The Last of Us

Currently reading: Outlander series

Current obsession: Elvis, Austin Butler, Pedro Pascal, Daredevil (Matt Murdock) // Unrelated: vintage phones, Winnie-the-Pooh, brownie bites, spooky + cute stuff, self-care, home improvement, vintage fashion, cute stationary/office supplies.

No pressure tags: @bluebeardtheblasphemous @writethrough @bookshelf-dust @precious-little-scoundrel @mooodyblue @mariposa-mila @ab4eva @powerofelvis @headfullofpresley

Sonya Massey was a paranoid-schizophrenic woman who turned to the police when she was scared and suspected an intruder inside of her home; she was a Black, mentally ill, woman shot dead and executed by a white police officer solely because she said "I rebuke you" over a pot of water. she was DUCKING DOWN behind a counter repeating the words "I'm sorry" as he advanced and, eventually, killed her. Sean Grayson, a white police officer, executed her.

her name was Sonya Massey. she was a human being who deserved to live. say her fucking name. Sonya Massey.

edit: please do not erase or negate the fact that Sonya was schizophrenic. Black schizophrenic people are more likely to die at the hands of the police as well as be brutalised by them, and by negating the fact that she was schizophrenic, you are erasing that this was an execution fuelled by BOTH racism & saneism. please have some respect and continue to say her name, thank you.

wild one pt. five | stranger things ; g.emerson

tag list babes + req rules / fandoms & characters ; reqs open + got a ? + masterlist

CHAPTERS ; 

one - two - three - four can all be found by clicking. my stranger things masterlist is here.

AUTHORS NOTES;

Listen, this story has me in a fucking chokehold rn. This came to me earlier and I thought it'd be cute so I decided to go for it. I mean, they needed themselves a little cozy moment, did they not? Annnyway, here we are, I guess?

Huuuuge thanks to everyone for indulging -and putting up with as well as interacting with my bullshit because it blows me away, you have no idea and I can't even begin to properly express just how much the likes / reblogs / reblogs with tags -i love the tags omg and comments truly mean to me when I get them, it just.. Fucking emotions, okay? It makes me so so so so so happy and inspires me and I just love you guys so much.

SUMMARY;

-- cheerleaders and drummers/freaks don't go together... or do they?

PAIRING;

Gareth Emerson x Fem!Reader (vague clothing / hairstyle description and glasses, a personality and female parts. Beyond these things, reader is blank slate.)

WARNINGS;

Fluff, oh my god. Like, it's also kinda domestic-y fluff? There's a little angst here, mutual pining, nothing real concerning.

TAGLIST;

@AURUMBELIS

@ALLELITESMUT

@ARIES-ARCADE

@COLE22ANN

@EBONYBLOOM

@HEYAITSKLAUDIA

@HCLOANGCLS

@HOESHII

@ICEQUEEN1371

@KRYS-ORION

@LETSBEDRAGONSTOGETHER

@LOUDERFORTHEBACK

@MUSICHEALSSCARS

@SECRETSICANTHIDEANYMORE

@SCOOBIESSNACKS

@THECHOICESLOOKGRIMM

@UNTITLEDAREA - these are all the names on my stranger things taglist. if you’d like to be added, please click the link at the top of the post.

OTHER STUFF;

Set in S4. All parties (Gareth, reader) have been aged up to 18, so everyone is legal for anything that may occur down the road. No deaths, no Vecna, no Upside Down, only your typical high school crush to lovers cheesefest, so if you're into that, have fun!

The scent of marinara hits his nose and makes his stomach growl as he steps through the front door of his house. He bends down to pull off his sneakers like usual. He knows his mom and dad went out for a date night to celebrate something or other, so he knows that his mom got a babysitter. However… The babysitter usually doesn’t bother with the stove. And she usually doesn’t play with his little sisters or anything like that. 

“Leah?” he calls out, brows knitting when she doesn't answer, an irritated huff to her voice or call out for him to cram it, she's on the phone. Because all she does is watch some shitty soap and tie up the phone all night whenever she sits.

His sister tugs his jeans leg. “Mommy got us a new sitter, Gare!”

He bends to pick up the little girl and he laughs. “Oh, she did, huh?”

“Mhm! She’s fun.” his little sister answers, yawning as she lays her head against his shoulder. “She’s makin spaghetti.”

And then, he hears you calling out to the sister currently in his arms from the kitchen. Laughing as you call out to her. “Sweetie, don’t just throw the door open, ‘kay? Remember our talk? You gotta make ‘em identify themselves first.”

You lean in the doorway between his mother’s kitchen and the living room, his youngest sister balanced on your right hip. He’s thrown for a loop because you’re wearing these big but adorable black framed glasses that keep sliding down your nose. Your hair is half up and half down, those two pigtails you wore all through cheer camp the week before. He’s trying not to stare like an idiot but he can’t help himself. 

“Gareth?” and like always, when you say his name, it’s like his brain shuts down for a few seconds to reboot. So while that’s happening and he’s caught up in that, you’re staring right back but naturally, this doesn’t register to him. You laugh softly. Raise a hand, your finger catching in the end of one of your ponytails. 

“Leah’s not babysitting?” Gareth finally manages to form words. 

You shake your head and laugh, grinning. “No. I guess your mom talked to Susan. Apparently, Mrs. Sinclair recommended me when she was asking around for other babysitters?” you can feel your cheeks burning hot and you know you’re staring at him but whenever you try not to, you can’t stop. 

Finally, you manage to pull yourself together, grinning at his little sister. “You hungry, little bit? The noodles should be done.”

Then you hear the pot on the stove bubbling and you bite your lip, turning away to rush back into the kitchen. You get to the stove just before the water bubbles over the rim of the pot. “Wouldn’t have happened if I had a wooden spoon to put over this.” you mumble to yourself, mostly so you’re not hyper aware of Gareth as he lingers in the doorway between rooms watching you.

You place his little sister on her feet and grab the pot so you can drain the noodles into the colander you’d placed in the sink and as you’re going to pour out the pasta to drain, some of the hot water splashes up and makes contact with your wrist.

“Fudge popsicles. Son of a biscuit.” you say it instead of what you would’ve said if you were at your own house in your own kitchen. Gareth snickers quietly. You stop in front of him and you’re holding out your arms, giggling softly as his little sister comes to you. “You can’t go t’ sleep yet, little bit. You’ve still gotta eat.”

The little girl yawns but smiles, eyes drooping. “She should sleep real good tonight. We went to the park down the street since Emma watched Janelle tonight, they got to play.” you say it as you place the little girl in her high chair.

His brain finally decides that it wants to function again and he chuckles, speaking up at last. Gaze fixed on you intently. “Yeah, they’re always over there playing with her.”

You smile and nod. You’re trying not to, but you’re doing it again, staring at him with not a thought in your brain. It happens a lot lately and you’re torn between being annoyed by it and utterly baffled by it. You nod to the pasta on the stove. “Are you hungry?”

He laughs, dragging his hand through sweaty curls. “I could eat, yeah.”

“Don’t be too impressed, by the way. Susan taught me how to make this and this is the first time I've actually ah.. tried to without her supervising me,so... yeah. It’s the only thing I know how to make.. Right now.” you say it with this cute little smirk. You go to push your glasses up, grumbling about how much you hate them under your breath and Gareth bites his lip, eyes fixed intently on your finger as you push the glasses up onto your nose. “I uh.. Didn’t know you wear glasses.”

“I didn’t until today when they came in. Went to the eye doctor last week and apparently, the reason I’m a clumsy person has a lot to do with being blind as a bat. I mean not really, but my vision was bad.” you’re burning up all over and you can’t help but feel just a little pinned by his intent gaze. “Go ahead.” you pout a little. “You’re dying to laugh, I know it.”

“No, no.” Gareth says it and shakes his head. He’s not dying to laugh at all. He’s dying to tell you how hot you look, how the way you look right now, white cropped bra thing, slightly baggy sweatpants, your hair all wild and half up, half down with the glasses that won’t stop slipping down your nose just seems to fit you so much better than any other way he’s seen you lately whenever you cross paths. He wants to reach out and push your glasses up on your nose for you, maybe reach out and place his other hand on your hip, let his fingers drag lazy designs against soft,bare skin. He wants to be closer to you and lately, the more he runs into you like this, the harder it gets to fight this off.

It’s happened again, he’s stepped closer to you. Practically engulfing you as you tilt your head a little, hair falling away from your neck as you stare up at him and try to pull your gaze away, focus it anywhere else. You don’t even realize that you’ve got a hand on his upper arm resting against it until you feel the soft of his black sleeve under your hands and as soon as you do, you can feel your face burning and you’re quick to pull your hand away just to keep from making things weird or awkward.

Like they can’t be any more awkward than the night you covered him in cake flavored vomit in a classmates basement because you were just so nervous about kissing him because you really wanted to.

His other little sister runs past and you reach out, picking her up, the two of you laughing. “Did you wash your hands?” you ask her.

She pouts. Shakes her head no.

“Go wash your hands.” Gareth speaks up.

And even though he’s not using that tone on you this time, you can’t help but feel your stomach do that lazy flip that it does when he is using that tone on you lately.

Which is a lot, truth be told.

His little sister goes back upstairs to wash her hands and you’re poking around in cabinets in search of plates to put the pasta on. Gareth ends up behind you, reaching up over your head to grab them when he sees them in the cabinet you’ve opened and this puts his chest against your back.

Gareth has to grip his mother’s favorite plates just so he doesn’t drop them or sit them back down on the stack too hard and his breath hangs long enough in his throat that he wonders if he’s going to breathe again anytime soon. And his breath is warm against the shell of your ear, tickling at it as he mutters quietly, “I got it.”

You glance over your shoulder at him and you’re surprised that your brain allows you to get out a nod because the way he’s awkwardly pressed into you from behind has you beyond flustered. If he had one tenth of a clue what he did to you.

But he doesn’t.

He takes the plates and goes over to the table, sitting them out. One directly across from the other. And then he goes to another cabinet and digs out two pink plastic plates, stopping by the stove to fix his sisters their plates. You’re about to get up and get your own but he grabs the plate and goes back to the stove, returning with a plate and a fork, sitting it in front of you.

Then he fixes one for himself and sits down.

You’re twirling the pasta around your fork and you raise it to your lips and Gareth’s gaze fixes on you as he takes his own bite. Groaning at the taste as it bursts in his mouth. “This is good.”

You grin. “Yeah? Maybe there’s hope after all that I won’t burn down Hawkins High when I take stupid Home Ec this year.”

He can’t help but laugh at it and you take another bite. “Susan, she’s uh.. Teaching me stuff.” you muse aloud, twisting some hair around your finger as you place your fork on the plate for a minute or two. “Did you have band practice tonight or was it that uh.. The game.” you rub your temple trying to remember what Lucas called the game they’re always playing, the one that Gareth and his friends happen to play too.

“Dnd?” Gareth questions and you smile, nodding. “Yeah, that. What’s that stand for anyway?” you ask, curious.

“Dungeons and Dragons.” Gareth answers, taking another bite. Trying not to stare like an ass across his table at you when you take a bite out of your own plate too.

“Oh. Okay, that sounds cool, actually.” you admit, your soft laughter tapering off as you take another bite before you start to ramble or say something annoying or just do too much and annoy him because you’re not dumb. You know that lately, you’ve been crossing paths a lot more. And sooner or later, it’ll probably happen, you’ve already annoyed him one time this summer.

“Yeah, it’s fun.”

“My thing is poker. Or darts. It does sound interesting, I mean from what Max’s boyfriend has explained to me about it.”

Gareth scoffs. “Those kids still use a rulebook for everything. You should let somebody who’s played the game longer explain it.” he’s half joking and maybe, just the tiniest bit of what he’s just said is him and the overwhelming desire to make himself look better even though he knows it’s pointless, because you and him will never work out, there’s too much against it. He just can’t stop himself or turn it off lately and the more he runs into you at random like this, the more it seems to grow out of control. The more he finds himself doing -and saying, things that he probably should keep to himself.

You gaze at him thoughtfully. “Maybe I should.” you’re twisting your pasta again and staring even though you know you shouldn’t be, that it has to be unsettling. He raises up in his chair a little and leans out across the table, dragging his thumb against the corner of your mouth and it takes every ounce of will you possess not to whimper or something equally embarrassing.

“You uh.. Marinara.” he manages to stammer out, quick to pull his thumb away and sit back down in his chair. You swallow hard and nod, that cute little quiet giggle coming next as you glance down at the white cropped top you’d thrown on to wear with your sweats tonight.

You’d dressed for comfort, figuring there was little to no chance you’d encounter him while you were here and honestly, you were torn between wanting to kick yourself for it and being glad that you were a little comfortable right now because you were all tensed up. And now, you have the homemade marinara Susan taught you to make on Monday night on your top, so there's that..

“Thank you.” you smile as you pop the last bite into your mouth. As you stand to put your own plate into the sink, he winds up right behind you again. Reaching around to sit his plate into the sink too. “Since they’re playing in it more than anything and look like they’re about a second away from face planting their plates, I’ll take ‘em to their room, alright?”

His breath tickles the shell of your ear and flustered, you just barely manage to stammer out a quiet, “ ‘Kay.” as you nod. He picks up his sisters, one on each hip and makes his way up the stairs to tuck them in and given that you have a little time to kind of relax and breathe, you lean against the wall and do it.

You jump a little and hurry to collect yourself as you hear him walking down the stairs again. And you busy yourself in a hurry, washing the dishes and stacking them neatly in the rack next to the sink to dry. You can feel him watching you but you’re just too damn flustered to really look up just yet.

If he had even a tenth of a clue what being around him actually did to you…

Submit Your Tattoo Here: Tattoos.org

The Signs Texting

Starts a conversation then never replies: Sagittarius, Libra

Takes like 5 years to text back: Capricorn, Aries, Aquarius

Reads your message but forgets to reply: Taurus, Pisces, Cancer, Leo

Starts a conversation and tries to make it last: Virgo, Gemini, Scorpio

wild one pt eight | stranger things ; g.emerson

tag list babes || req rules / fandoms + characters || send me asks/reqs? || masterlist

CHAPTERS ; 

one - two - three - four - five - six - seven can all be found by clicking. stranger things masterlist is here but warning it is a clusterfuck and badly outta date rn.

AUTHORS NOTES;

This story still has a chokehold on me. And it may seem like it, but this one is not over yet. They still have to get through senior year. I have uh.. plansss. So this came to me earlier. And this story is still kind of going to be a slow burn (in that they still aren't 'official' yet) but.. this chapter might make it seem like they're not. Anyway, I thought it was cute as hell when the idea came so I humored it.

You guys are so sweet and so amazing, oh my god, I love you all so much. You don't know how much your interactions / the fact that you even read and indulge me in my bullshit makes me so so so happy. And your comments, likes, reblogs + reblogs with tags ugh, they always leave me so happy and my mind is blown. Thank you guys so so so much, i can't ever express this well enough. Emotions. Fuck.

SUMMARY;

-- cheerleaders and drummers don't mix... or maybe they do?

PAIRING;

Gareth Emerson x Fem!Reader ( beyond female parts, personality and outfits descriptions/wearing glasses, fem reader is left blank.)

WARNINGS;

Awkward and cute fluff. Swearing. Mentions of vomit and two lil babies being cute and awkward together... For now, hehe.

TAGLIST;

@littlestarfighter03

@allelitesmut

@aries-arcade

@aurumbelis

@cole22ann

@ebonybloom

@hcloangcls

@heyaitsklaudia

@hotgirlsshareaccounts

@hoeshii

@icequeen1371

@krys-orion

@letsbedragonstogether

@louderfortheback

@musichealsscars

@oflavenderandevie

@suits-and-smirks

@secretsicanthideanymore

@scoobiessnacks

@thechoiceslookgrimm

@untitledarea - these are the only names on my stranger things taglist. If you want to be on it, let me know or add yourself to the link at the top.

OTHER STUFF;

Set in S4. Everyone is of age here, 18. There is no Upside Down or Vecna or deaths. Just teenagers going through the ups and downs that are a senior year and doing cute shit together. So if you like slice of life / fluff / some occasional angst, this is the one.

He’s watching the doors of the bar every few seconds and it gets to a point where Grant feels the need to speak up, laughing. “Relax. She’ll be here, Gareth.”

“And if she doesn’t show, no big deal.” Eddie’s trying to look at it diplomatically despite knowing his best friend will be crushed. Jeff nods, agreeing, but he grins at Gareth. “She’ll be here though. You’ll see.”

And then the doors to the bar burst open and Jeff chuckles, nudging Gareth in the side. “She’s here. Told you, Emerson.”

Nothing on earth prepares him for what he turns around to find. You’re sitting at the bar in his flannel, a red cropped shirt and cutoffs and the red pull on boots you’ve worn since tenth grade. You’re fidgeting with the sleeve of his shirt as you talk to the woman working the bar and sip a drink. All he can do is stare. Gape, honestly. Jeff cackles at the look on his face and Gareth is biting down on his lip so hard he’s wondering why it isn’t bleeding yet. Eddie’s the one who gives him a shove and nods in your direction. “You gonna do something or stand around and stare all night, Emerson?”

And he’s walking towards you before he can stop himself. Lingering nearby, shuffling his feet. You lock eyes mid-laugh at something the bartender Angel is telling you and give him that little grin, waving him over. He makes his way over just in time to see you pop one of the cherries floating in your glass into your mouth and his eyes fix on the way your lips form a little O, dazed. 

“Sorry. I wanted to get here earlier but I wound up taking Max over to El’s.” you want to kick yourself when your words tumble out right on top of each other. Your glasses are slipping again and you grumble, blowing out an exasperated breath. You were just about to push them up on your nose properly but Gareth does it before he can stop himself, a hand lingering against your cheek. You know your skin has to be on fire and you’re mortified because you usually don’t blush at all until lately, when he’s involved and it seems as if that’s all you ever do now. You tilt your head a little, grinning up at him. Reaching down to your drink to pluck out another cherry and pop it into your mouth.

Because if you keep eating the cherries, it keeps your mouth busy. There’s less of a chance that you’ll try to kiss him on a whim and have a repeat of 7th grade.

Angel’s watching the two of you and she’s laughing to herself about it because it’s just too cute and she can’t resist.

“It’s okay.” his brain and mouth finally decide to work. “You didn’t have to come tonight. But I’m glad you’re here.” his voice drops a little towards the end and it goes a little huskier and you can’t help but squirm a little on the stool. You smile at him and you’re hit with a case of the giggles. “Me too.” and that silence settles over but it’s not awkward tonight it’s different somehow. And thicker, you can’t help but notice that. And upon noticing it, you wind up leaning forward on the stool just so that you’re closer to him. 

,, okay, shit.. Uh… work brain, c’mon.” he’s trying to come up with what he needs to do next in the situation and it results in him stepping in front of you so that he’s standing between your legs, a hand planted on either side of the stool so that you’re encased. 

He half expects you to pull away, so he’s surprised when you don’t. You lean in a little closer to him. Playing with the front of his shirt when you do it just so  you keep your hands all nice and distracted. Eddie clears his throat from nearby and nods to the little makeshift stage at the front of the bar. You giggle, pulling away just a little and with a pout. “You’re up.” you mumble quietly. “I’m gonna find a closer seat.”

He steps away and you slip off the stool, slinking over to a booth to sit. Gareth takes himself several deep breaths and Eddie catches him before he goes to sit behind his drums. “You’ve gotta do something, Emerson. You have to.”

“And I am. I just.. Need to figure it out, Munson.”

They take the stage for their first song and you're clapping and laughing. As soon as you realize they're about to play one of your favorite older Metallica songs, you're grinning from ear to ear and you whistle before you can stop yourself.

Gareth can't stop staring at you and it's a wonder he doesn't mess up constantly, at one point, he watches you thrashing your head around because you're really into the song they're playing, grinning, singing along.

It's probably one of the most beautiful things he's ever seen if he had to be honest with himself. You're definitely not the girl he thought you were.

– ( after the show )

The show’s literally just ended and you make your way up to him when he steps out from behind the drums. You’ve been sitting there, squirming the entire time because watching him play was so damn hot and the whole time you’ve been watching him play, you’re telling yourself that you need to just go for it already, you don’t have a lot of time left, this school year will be over in the blink of an eye and you really don’t want to go off on your own without at least trying.

Of course the other half of you, the half that remembers every unholy mess that came of the multiple times your mother and father tried and failed, she’s speaking up and telling you why that’s not a good idea so you’re more than a little conflicted. 

“Holy shit, that was amazing.” you’re hugging against him before you can stop yourself once you’ve made your way over. You pull away to grin up at him and he’s blushing a little, but he’s smirking and it makes you laugh. You make yourself pull away even though you don’t really want to and then Eddie says something about going out into the alley to smoke before they come back in and start loading up their instruments for the night.

This is how you find yourself sitting in the open back of Eddie’s van, swinging your legs a little as you take a drag from your own cigarette. Gareth’s sitting next to you and you’ll reach over and twist his ring now and then, doing it without thinking about it.

It feels nice. It’s definitely something you can get used to. It's something you fully intend to get used to. If only you can get up the nerve to go for it, to do something..

Gareth is trying to ignore Eddie’s pointed looks now and then but finally, his own curiosity gets the best of him and he has to say something. At least let on that he knows you have his shirt and you’re wearing it right now. The guys have all gone back in to unplug everything and start carrying it out. And it’s quiet and there’s that thickness to it.

Maybe that’s why you blurt out what you wind up blurting out. “Remember that stupid game of seven in heaven?” you laugh when you ask him. Swinging your feet a little, taking a deep breath as you gaze up at the sky.

“Yeah.” Gareth chuckles. Tensing slightly because he’s not sure he’s going to like what you’re about to say.

You turn to face him and take a deep breath. “I gotta say this or I’m gonna lose my fuckin mind.” you mumble it mostly to yourself and Gareth clears his throat, speaking up with that firm tone. Gently gripping your jaw to make you look at him because right now, you’re staring at the way the flannel shirt covers your cutoffs and you’re lost in thought. “Say what?”

“You know the reason I threw up had nothing to do with you.. Right? I mean.. It did but it.. Fuck.” you laugh at yourself and shake your head, going quiet. Thumping your cigarette across the alley. Taking a deep breath so you can try again. “I threw up because I really really wanted to kiss you but I hadn’t ever kissed anybody before and I was nervous. It had nothing to do with wanting to get out of kissing you… Just like… so you know, I mean… Gotta say it sometime, right?” you give an awkward little laugh as you play with the end of the sleeves.

Gareth chuckles quietly. “ I always kinda thought it was to get out of kissing me. Especially when you ran out after it happened.”

You give him these big eyes and lightly swat at his chest, shaking your head. “No! No. No, that was not it at all. I uh..” you raise a hand and it catches in your hair, you’re tugging at it as you take a long and deep breath. “I actually elbowed Sara Miller until she gave me her turn so I could pick you.”

You laugh again quietly. “Holy shit, it feels good to get that out.” you’re looking up at the sky again. “You don’t have to uh do or say anything I uh.... I just wanted to say it? Because this year is it, we’re all probably gonna go off, do things and stuff and I just wanted to tell you that.” you start to stand because you’re trying so hard not to make this awkward at all but you’re only doing exactly that every time your mouth opens. It takes him the time it takes you to get to the front of the building like you’re heading to the parking lot but then he’s on his feet. Catching up to you when you’re just about to step out of the alley and into the parking lot. A hand on your shoulder to turn you around.

He’s laughing a little when you turn around. And then he’s towering over you, the laughter dies away. He’s got you caged in, back against the wall and he’s staring down at you. “You seriously tell a guy something like that and you run?”

You cringe a little, swallowing hard. “I.. I thought it was awkward?”

“I mean, yeah… But I actually wanted to say something too.” Gareth is leaning into you a little closer, a hand palm down against the dingy brick wall of the building as he stares down into your eyes. Dazed and whatever it was he planned on saying when he stopped you from bolting just now has vanished from his brain entirely. 

“What about now?” he asks after a few seconds. “Huh?” you mutter, tearing your gaze off of plush pink lips and trying to focus. Gareth swallows hard. “I,uh…” he swears under his breath and rubs the bridge of his nose, annoyed with himself. It’s not like he has any doubts left. “Let me try again.” he’s got a hand on your hip now. You nod, laughing softly. “ ‘Kay.” a fit of giggles because he’s used that firm tone only this time, it’s more or less him being annoyed with himself than it has anything to do with you. Or trying to reign you in -because he cares and he wants to take care of you, of course, which is something he feels he'll definitely have use for it in the future.. If he can get past this little hiccup in front of him right now, that is.

He takes a few deep breaths. “Do you want to kiss me now? Or did that uh.. Change?” he stumbles through the question.

You’re biting your lip, staring up at his mouth intently. Lost in thought. Distracted. “What if I do?” the question slips out quietly. Your breath hanging in your throat and your heart about to beat right out of your chest. One of you has to do something and it just so happens that both of you decide to try and go for it at the exact same time, your noses crashing against each other as you both pull away wincing. “Ouch. Are you alright?” he’s gazing down at you in concern. You’re giggling again, grumbling about yet again, effectively being your own worst enemy and he chuckles, gripping your jaw. “Let me try again.” he mumbles, using his grip on your jaw to pull your mouth against his. His teeth catch against your bottom lip, tugging, sucking at it until you can feel it starting to ache. 

From the door leading out into the alley, Eddie chuckles and he stops Jeff and Grant shy of bursting out with their equipment to put in the van with a shake of his head, gesturing them over to take a peek at what’s happening outside instead. 

Gareth’s hand is on your hip, fingers dragging lazily on your skin. You raise your arms, wrapping them around his neck. Your fingers catching in thick curls at the back of his head and tugging just a little. He’s surprised when he feels your teeth latch against his bottom lip but he groans, especially since you’ve melted into him. His tongue runs along your tongue after your mouth falls open willingly, met with no resistance on your end. You whimper and the sound is swallowed by the sloppy meeting of your mouths again and again, neither one of you willing to pull away for too long. When the series of kisses finally breaks so you can both catch a breath, a strand of saliva connects your mouths and you laugh softly, leaning your forehead against the front of his shirt. “Hey.. I didn’t hurl this time.” you joke and he snorts, laughing about it. Leaning down to wipe a thumb across your bottom lip because the tinted lip stain you were wearing smeared below your lip a little. “Your lipstick..” he chuckles and you gaze up at him, leaning against him heavily. “Yeah, I knew the packaging was bullshit when I brought it.” you shrug it off.

“We should probably go get your drums?” you ask, tilting your head to look up at him.

He nods but honestly, the last thing on his mind at the moment is going back inside the smoky bar. And every part of him wants to ask if the kiss was good, if it meant anything, but he stops himself shy of it.

It’s probably a miracle any of this even happened.

But then, you lean into his side when you’re both walking back down towards the door and like a reflex, he slips an arm around your waist.

“Shit! They’re comin in, act normal, dudes.” Eddie’s laughing, he’s trying not to give Gareth a shit eating grin and it’s really hard to refrain from saying something when he notices a very distinct cherry red tint to Gareth’s lips.

“You were watching, weren’t you?” Gareth asks Grant who gives a sheepish shrug. Jeff drags a hand over his head and Eddie shakes his head. “Us? Watch? Nooo. But you ah..” Eddie nods to Gareth’s lips and the way your lip stain smeared on them, smirking when he points out calmly, “It’s a lovely shade on you, Emerson.”

“Fucker.” Gareth flips him off, laughing. Flushed in the face.

“Go get your drums, dude. We’re about ready to roll outta here.”

“Yeah, okay, alright.” Gareth laughs. You wander over to the stage with him, sitting on it and swinging your legs while he breaks everything he needs to down to transport. 

“Hey..” you look up over your shoulder at him.

“Yeah?”

“Do you wanna.. Nevermind.”

“No, what?”

“Well.. I usually go sit up near the water tower.”

“Didn’t you and Emma get in trouble for climbing it last year during Homecoming?”

You giggle and shrug.

“You stay on the ground.. When you go up there, right?” Gareth asks, stepping closer. Gazing down at you in concern. "Some guy fell off in 79."

“Sometimes?” you bite your lip as you say it. “I will if you come with me tonight. You don’t have to.” you’re quick to add. You just don’t want the night to be over yet.

Gareth smiles at you and nods. “Yeah, I’ll come out there with you.”

You’re grinning at him and he chuckles quietly. “Let me get this in Munson’s van and we can go.”